Random Thoughts with Lisa

Oh the people of Starbucks...

2011-06-24T00:12:00.004-05:00

I still am thinking about this funny lady who was at Starbucks yesterday...

customer: "Do you have any of these Twin Cities mugs for Plymouth?"

me: "No, I think they just make those for the bigger cities."

customer: "Could you request them to make some for Plymouth? They have them for both Houston AND Austin in Texas."

me: "I really think they just make them for the bigger cities."

customer (while walking away): "Well, you do know that St. Cloud is the same size as Austin. Just put in that request."

me: "Sure (I'll get right on that, in a whisper), Have a nice day" (rolling my eyes, as her back is turned away by now)

For real lady? How in the world did St. Cloud get into this conversation? You were asking about PLYMOUTH, a suburb OF the Twin Cities, we did not discuss anything about St. Cloud. Maybe they'd consider St. Cloud in the future, maybe, but Plymouth?
Maybe you're misunderstood about the popularity of Plymouth. Even though it was ranked by some magazine "Top Ten places to live in the US" doesn't mean Starbucks cares enough to make a mug that has a photo of Plymouth Creek Community Center, or Medicine Lake etched in it with the text Plymouth, MN. Because, they'd have to write MN since there are probably 20 other cities in the US that are also called Plymouth.

Cheers!

Target's Starbucks coupons

2011-05-24T02:07:00.003-05:00

I work at Starbucks in Target.

A few times a day we have "guests" who have received a Target coupon for a Starbucks coffee drink. They get printed out at the end of the cashier's sale, nobody knows what the method is for who gets what coupon.

I seriously dislike these coupons. Not because you can save money, but because more often than not, the "guest" doesn't read the coupon correctly. I will agree that it can be a little bit confusing, BUT don't crab at ME when you find out you're saving .70 cents and not $3.00! The coupon states, $3.00 with coupon for a tall caramel frappuccino. Yes, I know it's confusing, tall's are actually small. But, to get back to the $3.00 bit, this doesn't mean that when I say you owe $3.22 after taxes, that you only owe .22 cents! I conversed with a woman for 3minutes about the fact that it said it was $3.00 with the coupon plus tax. She continued to say, okay so here's the $3.00(the coupon) and .22 cents(in change). This happened two times. She couldn't understand what it meant, and towards the end she was almost getting me confused about how it was to be read.
I know that our drinks are expensive, it's true. But, do you actually think we're going to give you THREE DOLLARS OFF?! (not shouting, just emphasizing, and add a little sarcastic flare to it)
The other popular question is, "Wow, they're usually $6.00?" Um, no.

Oh the stories I get to tell, and the people I get to laugh "with."

Starting up again

2011-05-24T00:51:00.004-05:00

Wow, it has been a seriously long time since I've blogged.

Major life events have come and gone. Boyfriend. Proex job lost. New job at Starbucks@Target in Ridgedale. Move to new place with friend. Additional job as nanny taken. New Church. Engagement. Nanny job ends. House gets broken into. Wedding Planning. Transfer to new Starbucks Target location in Plymouth. Move into Apt. Marriage. Honeymoon. Life as a wife..... Whew! That's a lot of stuff.

In my one of my last entries, I was optimistic and excited about my job loss, and looking at starting a business, etc. etc. My motivation was soon swept away by demands of a real paying job, positive distraction of my then-boyfriend now-husband, and realizing card-making wasn't going to pay the bills any time soon.

Next up... What am I doing with my life... now?! Where should we live next... and how do we save for a down-payment on a house? Is it possible to live without so much "stuff" and sacrifice space for money savings? Should I go to school for web design or hunker down and be disciplined to teach myself and update my rusty design skills? How do I learn to cook healthy, and why is it so hard to plan meals ahead of time?

These questions and more are what I will be blogging about, of course with some random thoughts and stories sprinkled throughout.

Alright friends. I'm going to try and do this atleast once a week. let's see how I do.

(click on blog title, or to the right in the Archives to see other entries)

My time at Temperance

2009-07-27T13:30:00.001-05:00

For the last year I've been wanting to make a journey up to the Temperance River to remember my dear friend Julie who gave her life for a friend in that place. Yesterday was the day I finally was able to fulfill my desire, along with a great companion to be whatever I needed. We departed from the cities at an early hour, after not having a full night's sleep, but it was awesome to be up in the Duluth area before 9am.

On the journey up we made the obligatory stop at Tobies for the famously delicious Caramel Rolls (we had Pecan) and some coffee and juice. We wanted to spend some time at Gooseberry and Canal Park, but saved those for the journey back. It's always a good time to take the scenic drive on the way up to Two Harbors, just past there we stopped at a scenic overlook for a few photo ops and rock skipping. As we drew nearer to Temperance I could feel in my spirit a bit of anxiousness. I really didn't know how being there was going to hit me, but I was glad to have a shoulder to cry on if I needed it or just someone to stand beside me in the quiet.

We parked the car, Ryan got out and got our cameras and stuff together while I put on my chacos. I was very quiet the whole time, and just had nothing to say. Even though I really didn't know any details of where things happened, it was all rolling around in my head. We walked down the path on the west side of the road up river. I wanted to know where they were, how it really could have happened. It just didn't seem possible, but I suppose the water is different each year and is unpredictable as well. Last year some friends put a cross and photo of Julie near the river somewhere, but I didn't see anything. I suppose with the year's passing seasons it was taken down or destroyed somehow.

In the time we took to hike around I just really wanted to have fun and enjoy myself, upon first looking out at the places I suspected they could have been I had my tears, but Julie was an adventurer so I celebrated that as well! I didn't have any deeply profound thoughts, but it was just a good time to remember a friend. Remember how we were going to hike and camp and have an adventure!

Today as I sit and write, I realized I could have brought something to throw in the water or something... but I didn't. And it's okay... you don't always NEED symbolism. Sometimes you just need that time and to just 'be' who you are in the moment. I think Julie was good at that, not trying to be anything else when she was in the moment with you.

The rest of the day was a good time too, we walked down to the lake at Temperance and climbed on the rocks that were at the edge of the lake. Found a quiet place and rested for awhile and got some sun in the process.

Gooseberry was the next destination, which is always a great one, but it always seems to be more populated with people. Spent some time there and then journeyed back down to Duluth with a stop at a scenic overlook close to Betty's Pies. We were going to stop in for a pastie, but also wanted to get going and it would take 10mins.. in our impatience we decided to save our appetites for something in Canal Park.

After a little jaunt in the wrong direction, we made it to Canal Park and ate at Grandmas Saloon.. another pretty popular destination. I have to say though, we had an AMAZING Steak Cheese French sandwich with thick sliced beef tenderloin, mushrooms, cheddar, mozzarella, and Philadelphia cream cheese. mmmmmmm...

I need to get going, so no profound ending either. A really great time all in all!

One Step Closer

2009-04-24T15:27:00.003-05:00

This last year (April 08 - April 09) has been quite the journey. A year ago I was packing my bags and preparing for my trip home from Australia. Saying good-bye's and making promises about traveling to see friends all over the world. Although the promises were heartfelt and honest, we knew inside that the possiblity of not seeing each other was much greater. It was a mournful, yet exciting time, as I had not seen lifelong friends from home in 7mos. Such strong conflicting emotions.

A year later and new territory is abounding before me in many aspects of my life. Being faced with a job lay-off, trip to Haiti with new people and places within the country, many new relationships, and new opportunities for beginning a business on my own. That has been the story of the new phase of life, and all through the new 'stuff' God is the same yesterday, today, and always... and He is EXCITED to be in these adventures of life with me. That really blows me away... sure I have felt the joy of God and I know He laughs and is so in love with me, but to stop and think He is as excited for what's to come, as I am!

I must say that this last year has not been easy, it has been filled with tears and fears, yet the constant thing that He continued to tell me was that He is my refuge. Hold tight and do not let go, I am bringing you through this and will point you in the direction you are to go. Keep going, Keep trusting and most of all, Keep dreaming... Delight yourself in me, and I will give you the desires of your heart. (psalm 37:4)

So, here I am, in a little over a month I'll be out of a job. I will again, be at the crossroads of "what will I do with my life"... so to speak... I am taking this opportunity to pursue my passions and start designing cards and designing for friends and businesses I find in the periodicals who desperately need an updated logo, etc. etc. Most of all, I am trusting in the Lord for His provision, knowing that He really has my back and won't let me go hungry.

Silent Travelling

2009-03-03T00:43:00.004-06:00

This past weekend I went on a roadtrip to see a friend from DTS get married in Cincinatti, Ohio. The other two MN dtsers and I headed out on Friday morning just after the snow had fallen the night before. The first stop on our journey was in Chicago to pick up one more fellow Ywamer and then on to our destination.

To describe my enjoyment of the weekend and the reasons behind it are very random and interesting, but what I want to emphasize tonight is actually what was not said at all.
The silence...
On a roadtrip, even with friends, you aren't always expected to be having conversation. It had been a very long time since I actually had time to just think and imagine... without feeling like I had to think of "important every day" things. I was silently encouraged and inspired to continue to yearn for more and not let myself believe that where I am in life is stuck, or a dead end, or "not good enough." Being in the presence of those who knew where I was last year, was a good reminder to be where I am, yet look past it with excitement and passion to where God may lead me next.. what really kind of blows my mind is that God was whispering things in the silences that at the time I didn't hear... but as I sit here and reflect, I hear the words before me.
I don't have a grandiose plan that God has revealed to me yet about what is next, but I believe there is more and I am choosing to trust Him like never before.
---
This morning I woke up earlier than normal before work, showered and made some breakfast and sat down to eat and read/journal. I put my iPod on Ten Shekel Shirt's album that has the popular worship tune "Meet with Me"... I also was reading a verse:

Acts 2:25
"I saw the Lord always before me.
because he is at my right hand,
I will not be shaken.
Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices;
my body also will live in hope,
because you will not abandon me to the grave,
nor will you let your Holy One see decay.
You have made known to me the paths of life;
you will fill me with joy in your presence."
(This is actually a quote from David in the Psalms.)

Shortly thereafter reading, tears came pouring down... I have been thinking a lot about my friend Julie S., who died a couple of months after I returned home from Australia. I think a lot more about death these days as well. I think the tears were another mourning and cleansing sort, mourning loss... loss of my friend and also of the time I spent in Australia. I don't think I realized how much I missed some of those times until I re-visited those memories with friends this weekend. I think that emotion came out today... I feel sometimes that maybe my heart is always going to be torn from places I want to be and people I want to see.
(I think that's a song)

I don't really know how to pull this all together... but felt like sharing it all... thanks for keeping on 'til the end!

cheers.

Burn Notice

2009-01-23T01:17:00.003-06:00

no. not the show on usa.

tonight i decided i needed to wash my norwex antibac cloth but didn't want to do a load of laundry. I decided to boil it... I put it in a pot with water, turned on the stove and headed downstairs to check some emails "quick"..

pause for a short commercial break. if you don't know what norwex is, click here or just be satisfied with knowing they are amazing cloths that you don't have to use chemicals/cleaners/cleansers to clean with.

back to the story..
30/45mins later I heard beeping.. did i put on the timer? hmm... (reality sets in) OH CRAP... I ran upstairs to a smoke filled kitchen/living room (not dark black smoke, though) and the pot on the oven with no water left and smoldering leftover of the cloth. i quickly removed the pot from the burner and ran around frantically opening doors and windows to let the smoke out (and to breathe fresh air). meanwhile the burner was still on and i'm coughing from smoke inhalation. i turned the burner off and stuck my head outside for the second time for some more fresh air during this time i was also waving a towel all around to direct the smoke out and also realized maybe i should set the thermostat down so the heat doesn't try to compensate. then, i had this brilliant idea of bringing the fan upstairs to point out the door to get more smoke out. once i got the fan upstairs and pointed out the door, it didn't seem to be as effective (erin, is this usage of the word correct?) as i first thought, but owell. about 10 minutes later i decided the smoke dissipated enough to close the doors, and i didn't want it to take all night to re-heat the house. this could have been much worse, so if this is at all amusing to you, i don't take offense. i just can't believe myself sometimes.

(i think i switched between writing in present tense to past or vice versa, so if something sounds funny, that's why. i don't feel like combing over it)

i cannot be trusted with leaving anything on the stove... what the heck was i thinking?!! I wonder how bad it is to inhale smoke from a cloth that had a silver lining? my lungs kinda hurt a little, but it's going away gradually.

so, if you ever thought "who would do that anyways" when reading those warnings about leaving something on the stove unattended or candles for that matter... it's me.

Thank the Lord that there were no flames or extensive damage, either!! (atleast I didn't see any flames!)

until next time...

cheers

Happy New Year.... Raheem!

2008-12-30T23:28:00.004-06:00

Tomorrow is New Year's Eve... I wish everyone a Happy New Year.

This year was filled with many high highs and low lows. I feel like a broken record, as I mentioned the same thing in the previous post, but it's true. And, on Saturday night, there was one last(hopefully) low, yet not so low at the same time. My dear young friend Raheem from Hopkins Village, Belize passed away due to complications with double pneumonia. His family hurried him to the hospital in Belize City only to find that their ventilator wasn’t working. They tried hand forcing the oxygen but finally Raheem asked for them to stop.
It is such a hard deal. He brought so much joy and life into many peoples lives, yet many days his health was not so good. The days I was able to be with him a couple years ago, were precious ones, filled with many giggles, smiles, and teasing. He was a good teaser. There were also moments where he was in pain, and just wanted to be alone or didn't have a whole lot to say. The last night I saw him, he said this to me, "Good bye Lisa, see you late.. uh next summer or uh sometime... Goodbye" He knew that I might not be back, so he said goodbye.
As much as I'm saddened by this, it also means Raheem is now running, skipping, jumping and swimming along with his sister Cindy who passed about two years ago now. Another cool thing is that this spring/summer Raheem got to live his dream and fly in a helicopter. Amazing.

I just pray now for their family... may comfort be surrounding them, most especially Destiny the last one who also has the disease. There are two other children, Sarah and Josiah... their mother is Vicky and their father is Neal. May they not lose sight of their savior. Emmanuel.. God with Us.

Reflections of Christmas and the New Year

2008-12-24T01:31:00.004-06:00

On this eve of Christmas eve, well actually it's 1am, so it IS xmas eve... I sit amongst the gifts I've wrapped and reflect on the time that has passed this year.

MUCH has gone on in my life and in my friends and families lives, as usual, but this last year it just seems like so much more. For me, there were many transitions and changes from travels to several countries, to adjusting back home, figuring out what to do when your plans don't work out, moving out of the 'rents house and finding a job to pay the bills.

My "christmas card" broadly made points on each of these things, but as I listened to this week's sermon online some things became a little clearer. The message title was The Unexpected Cost of Mary's "Yes" and it really got me thinking about the place I am in right now.

Since before I left Australia, the Lord gave me an invitation, to follow in the footsteps of the unknown and trust that He will provide. I accepted an invitation to live life in a different way, to not go back to where I was before I left. I am in new waters... and they are hard to wade through at times. I am constantly reminded that as a culture, what we "do" for a living is highly valued. And for me, when I talk about my "job" and what I do for a "living"... I have these mixed feelings inside. I get a knee jerk when I tell people I work at Ritz Camera/Proex Portraits because my education was for Graphic Design and I just got back from a Discipleship Training School... why am I not a missionary or a designer for some company? I fear that people will judge me because I'm not using my education and I said "no" to going back to my old job where I was making a decent amount more than I do now. Who does that?
Me.
If you've followed my blog at all in the last 6mos. you know that my original plans upon returning were to get a job at a coffee shop... get the feel for what it's like. One of my ideas in the future is to own/work for/co-colaborate a coffee shop that incorporates art, music, and loose ministry, and GOOD coffee and tea... a place for people to connect and build relationship.
No jobs were opening up in the coffee shop biz... times are tight... plan b. I didn't have a plan b, and so I desperately found a job at Target... hated it. THen, landed a job at Proex.

Okay, so, what does all this mean and how is this a reflection of Christmas... I think it's a theme for a lot of us, that when we say "yes" to God we don't know what the weight of that yes fully means until we're in the midst of it. Mary didn't know either... but HE did. And He throws a lot of stuff on us that we ourselves can't handle... without Him.

So, this new year, I'm leaning on Him again and often times I will fail to spend as much time with Him as I want to... but I'm going to try harder... not because I should, because I desire and want to...
I'm going to step out in faith and focus on the things I want to do... my greeting card line, and also be in conversation to others about the coffee shop idea. I know God has placed these things on my heart and I want to see what He will do with them.

(p.s. it's actually dec. 26th.. haha)

2008-11-08T23:07:00.002-06:00

Last week was the Novembering service at Open Door.. they set aside specific time to remember those who we've lost in the past year. I didn't know that a part of the sermon would be recounting some of the memories from Julie's death. I felt it again as I heard it the first time, albeit less sobbing and more just free flowing tears, and I realized how close it still felt and still how tragic it happened.

I still really miss her, and still wonder how it can hurt so much when it felt like we'd only known each other for such a short time. In all honesty, there were times since I had gotten back until her death that I wondered if we always really "clicked" or if she really enjoyed my company. I guess that stuff was just my insecurity, maybe because she talked so much of the time and I wondered if she thought it odd that I didn't always have something to say. This much I know now, she was like that with everyone, and that's why we loved her so much. The things she said always had to do with people, because she cared about everyone so much and could tell stories of our lives to her other friends. Of course, it wasn't gossip... most of the time.... :) ;) She just... well.. yeah, she was a story teller.. a really good story teller, and I loved to listen to her.

There was this one time though... I was at home talking to my mom about something "semi" important or atleast it was just a good conversation.. and julie called... the first thing I thought was... hmm, this might be a long convo. but, maybe not. Well, sure enough... we finished making some plans and then somehow she told me all about this other thing that happened on some other day that sort of fit and yet also was definitely a bunny trail. At the end of the conversation we laughed about how the majority of the conversation had nothing to do with the initial call. I went back to the kitchen to find my mom and if I recall correctly, it took us a few minutes to remember what we had been talking about. The thing is, I love stories, especially ones with good/interesting or funny endings... and hers most always had them.

Thanks for listening blog-land... it's good to tell stories and thoughts... I guess it just helps in the process of this. So, this is what remains, it's still hard... 4months or whatever later... and there's no guidebook on grief (okay, maybe there is, but i don't know where it is)... so i just let myself feel what it is at that moment, and not drag it on if it's not there.

yep... so ... love you and miss you still julie... oh wandering sales!

tales of target, fall, and the art in me

2008-11-08T21:59:00.003-06:00

The last time I wrote I was in much confusion about where I was headed and how it was going... I was sifting through it. I still am, but I have found a better fitting full time job now, which has brought a certain peace to my soul.

Let's back track a bit before I tell of my new position.

If there was one thing I learned from Target, it was how much I'll appreciate the service from the employees, the ones who put my fitting room items back... and the ones who also put back my returns... and the ones who help me find things and ask "can i help you find something" even though they hate feeling like a bother. I've also learned that it is much harder to begin a conversation being the one who is ringing your purchase because you've said the same things over and over to the guest and after the 5th one, it's hard to be original. I loved when the guest would engage in my question of "how are you today" and ask me the same thing.

The fall went by quickly and technically I suppose it's still fall... but I so enjoyed watching the leaves turn colors. I didn't get to see much of that last year, as I left just as they started to change. I raked leaves in my back yard and took walks around the neighborhood and even biked all the way to Lk Calhoun and back from Hopkins. Although in the fall there were many cries out to God saying "HELP ME, WHAT HAVE I DONE?!"... He's guided my steps and brought me to a place of deep dependence and continuing understanding of being His Beloved.

About two weeks ago during a spiritual direction session a question was posed to me that maybe painting and creating in my Rabbi's presence is something he is calling me to, things that are only for Him and for nobody else. Creating things for Him, just because. Going back to the basics and not worrying about color theory, concept, or layout... just putting colors on paper and seeing what happens. The times I have done this have been kind of theraputic, and oftentimes hard because I always have this dialog going in my head thinking about concepts and fonts and layouts. Getting out of that mind-set is hard, but I think it is essential to learn before I go deeper into starting any kind of business. (I'm not saying it's totally on hold... just on stand-by, if you will)
As I look back over the last years, everything I've ever created (aside from photos and personal things) has always been "for something"... be it a customer, family member, friend, school assignment, or projects during DTS (I always felt like my paintings had to measure up to something). In all of those scenarios, there was someone I was trying to impress or do my best for.. it wasn't all wrong, but if you don't have balance, it's not a good thing. During outreach I was really faced with these things... so afraid that my paintings wouldn't be "good enough" and could I even be called an artist. For so long, I've wrapped a lot of my identity in being an artist, when the truest thing about me to the core is that I am God's Beloved, His child. He loves the gifts he has given me, but they alone don't make me who I am. He desires for me to use them but not find myself in them. As an artist, it is hard to be balanced and put yourself into a creation, yet have a separation knowing that if it doesn't meet someone's expectations it doesn't mean you personally have failed. Even in writing that, I confuse where the line is and have a hard time explaning the concept. I guess I'm still articulating it, but what I know is true is that I need to spend time creating just to create... for my Abba.. and for nobody else... and if at some point I decide to use some of those things in the future, so be it. But, I do know that some of those things are for Him and Him only.

I was going to write about my current job now, but I think it makes more sense to just leave this post as is... until next time...

cheers, mate!

Time to start writing again

2008-10-04T21:33:00.003-05:00

It's time... there are many thoughts running through my head tonight. There have been for many nights, it's just that I haven't made the time to write because somehow it feels like work, even though I know it will be good when I finally get it all out.

Three weeks ago I made a decision to move out of my parents house and moved in with a friend and one of her friends. We live in Hopkins, in a little house, and it actually has a white picket fence around the backyard. It's this great deal for rent and has a basement where I can set up my desk/computer AND easel etc. to paint.
I felt the pull to get out on my own, and at this point I don't know if it was "God's leading" or just me feeling the need to move out of my parents' house. God bless 'em, they were great for letting me take their space, but it was time.
Moving out meant finding a job... somewhere, anywhere.. (close that is) and one place that is ALWAYS hiring is Target. These things happened fast, and before I knew it I got this job and now I'm working about 40hrs/wk... and I'm asking myself... What am I doing? No, this is not the perfect fit for me, but I need to pay the bills I've now chosen to take on with moving.
It's not ideal, and often I feel I may have made the leap a little too soon. I am accepting the place where I'm at right now, but I can't pretend that it's easy or say that I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that these were the right decisions. I do know that the Lord is still with me in this place I am in... He's in the struggle within me.

What I do know beyond a shadow of a doubt is that God is leading me into new and unknown waters, and it is extremely scary. I often feel like I'm on a rollercoaster of feelings... thoughts of excitement about what free-lancing and painting might look like, but then to be contrasted with thoughts wondering if I really can make it work and ever survive without another income.

I still have yet to land on a name for my free-lancing company... the one I have been tossing around is LizBec Design... but when I tell others, they don't give me the impression that it's a great name. It's not ALL about what others think, but it does make a difference and I'm still not even sold on it.

Just Design it!

2008-08-21T17:17:00.003-05:00

That's a terrible play on words... or I don't even know if it's a play on words... it's instead of "Just Do it"... you know, Nike.

Anyways... I've kicked myself in the butt and decided that the only best time to start this free-lancing I keep talking about is NOW. The present... if I don't just start, I'll never do anything, it'll always be... "I'll start when I get a full time job, or when the summer ends, or when pigs fly... basically... and I don't want that to happen.

SO...... here we go... I don't know exactly where the best place is to start, except that figuring out a name for myself, my company is probably a good place. That's where I get stuck... Lisa's Designs is boring... I want something that's me, but isn't overboard. Anybody out there like to play with words or come up with ideas?? Heelllp!

What do you need from me to help YOU brainstorm? Let me know...

cheers.

remembering julie... and the struggle of the process

2008-07-03T01:04:00.002-05:00

Last week in the midst of my thursday I heard some terrible news. A friend that I had reconnected with, a few months before I left for Australia, died in a tragic death at the Temperance River.

The last 7days have been rough. I've struggled with many thoughts... such as... I didn't know her as long as some, why am I so upset? Of course I'm upset, she was an amazing woman who connected with others and was intentional about where she invested her time. I was honored to be invested in, and invest in her in return.

As I type this, images of her run through my mind. I think we connected on a deep level without even having loads of deep conversations. I just knew she cared about our friendship and where it was going... I think we both knew that it was going to be long lasting. I think that's where the hit comes so hard, I was so looking forward to spending time getting to know her more. We were supposed to counsel together in a couple of weeks at the jr high Angel Tree camp, which happened to be held at the same camp we both counseled at back in the summer of 1999. At that time, as I've been sharing with others lately, Julie and I never really spoke much and the only reason I can come up with is because my best friend was counseling with me that summer. I really wish the circumstances back then were different, but in this last year it was our joke that "we never spoke back then, not a word."

I brought up a question or struggle last night as I was posting on a wall of a friend on facebook... i said,

"i've wrestled sometimes with knowing what/how to pray... except for comfort and peace. sometimes, truthfully(- using in tribute to julie) i tire of praying it over and again, i want there to be something else to say".

And also, truthfully there are more words to say to my God in heaven, my abba father, but the words are just my struggle and i want to have words that feel like they are "helping" in some way or something. I know God knows my heart, and he's not interested in my exact wording... I guess just showing up is even enough sometimes. But then, sometimes I struggle saying "I'm praying for you, or my prayers are with you" to others because in this specific situation I really don't have the words to pray. Can you pray for others without words? Or maybe it's that I really don't give it as much thought, i give up with the words. i don't know... just processing this as i type. any thoughts out there?

Thanks for listening to my ramblings tonight.

I guess this begins my posts at Random Lisa Thoughts... although it sounds like blogging is especially rare these days...

Look to: www.lookingforaruggedaussieman.blogspot.com from now on

2007-09-26T12:48:00.000-05:00

Hello my friends... I will no longer be posting here, so like the title says... go to:
www.lookingforaruggedaussieman.blogspot.com for posts leading up to and as I am in Australia.

peace out-

Q. Where does tie dye come from?

2007-09-06T00:05:00.000-05:00

A. Africa

This was another one of those "kids say the darndest things"... this time it was Sarah.

I was commenting on her shirt because it was a pretty tie dye pink swirl. So she says, "I know where tie dye comes from!" So I say, "where?" And she replies, "from Africa" I asked, "how did you find that out?" "From a TV show about Africa, they were making tie dye shirts."

So, there you have it.... Where tie dye comes from, by Sarah, age 6.

Soon to come is an entry about one of my childhood hang-out places being knocked down. It even comes with pictures. Until then....

ciao

Kids say the Darndest things

2007-08-26T01:07:00.001-05:00

My sister and the fam were here this weekend. On Friday evening, my sister, Pat and I went to the place we're getting our tattoos to plan what we wanted. It was good to get some inspiration and to make sure he can do what each of us wanted.

On Saturday afternoon I had some time to play with Sarah and Josh... here's a little excerpt from one conversation.

While swinging on the bench swing on the swing set with Sarah and Josh I was saying how much I loved them both. I leaned over and pecked each of their heads. I didn't quite get Josh's head, but knew he realized what I was doing. He said something and then stood up on the swing and grabbed at the top of the canopy. I asked him what he was doing and he said, "I was catching your kiss, it floated up to the ceiling."
I love that boy... he's really into blowing kisses, and if you don't catch his kisses, he gets upset! :) cutie.

another spider story

2007-08-04T20:43:00.000-05:00

This afternoon after one of the many rain/sprinkle/spit episodes, I went to open the picture window in the living room. I unlocked the window started opening, and to my left (not by the screened part) was a LARGE spider! I'm posting a picture I tried to take, it's a little blurry, but it's large. (i should point out, it's on the OUTside)
I'd like to call it ugly and very frightening, but it's not ugly black which intrigues me the slightest bit. It's like one of those "it's so awful you don't want to look, but you have to, or still somehow want to" does that make any sense. Or, as my sister told me of the pictures we took of the birth of Julia... (ie. they were sorta graphic) she didn't necessarily love the angle of the shots, but also just had to look because of the miracle. So, spiders I wouldn't say are the best miracle of the world, but to see the intricacies of the arachnid is pretty amazing. so... interesting yet, still mildly paralyzing to me. (i can't believe i just compared my niece's birth to an arachnid!)

I think that it was a wrong choice to watch that awful movie "Arachnaphobia" when I was in middle school. I really think that's where my fear deepened.. seriously. Who wouldn't be freaked out by deadly spiders... they can migrate to different cultures... it's not like it's out of the complete realm of possibility.

This really looked like a mini-turantula (sp?), makes my knees weak. blech...
Here's the infamous creature:

It's really hard to figure the size, but it's body is about the size of my thumbnail, but maybe a little less wide. eeeeewwwwww...
atleast it's on the OUTside... and it better stay there!

It's up!

2007-07-14T12:31:00.000-05:00

I decided to just "Go 4 Launch".... click here for a direct link to my new Aussie blog! Woot Woot!

Connected!

2007-07-14T11:15:00.000-05:00

For almost two weeks now, my computer has been dis-connected from the internet. I kept thinking to myself, "This computer was a ton of money, I should be able to use it without being connected to the internet." It's amazing how crippled I felt the computer was without having internet!

The last two weeks have been really busy with work, and it didn't help with 4th of July being at such an odd time. I finally got to yesterday and was relieved to see that the folders on my desk were all pretty much up to date. What a great feeling, so with all that done I left a little early!

I wrote a blog for my new blog site in that span of time, knowing that while in Australia, I may not have a lot of time on the internet and will be needing to journal at times I'm not "connected." I'm still working on the new blog look, but hopefully it will be up next week! Hurrah!

This next week I will be house-sitting for two friends... they live not a mile down from each other. I'm glad I can help both of them out! One family has two dogs, the other two cats... and of course plants to water, etc. It shouldn't be too hard, and they live by some biking trails so I might do some of that this week. Yay!

it's NOT about me

2007-06-26T22:24:00.000-05:00

⁷⁴To grant us that we, being rescued from the hand of our enemies,
Might serve Him without fear,
⁷⁵In holiness and righteousness before Him all our days.
⁷⁶"And you, child, will be called the prophet of the Most High;
For you will go on BEFORE THE LORD TO PREPARE HIS WAYS;
⁷⁷To give to His people the knowledge of salvation
By the forgiveness of their sins,
⁷⁸Because of the tender mercy of our God,
With which the Sunrise from on high will visit us,
⁷⁹TO SHINE UPON THOSE WHO SIT IN DARKNESS AND THE SHADOW OF DEATH,
To guide our feet into the way of peace."
Luke 1:74-79 Zacharias's Prophecy (the last half)
(capitals added by bible.com... color added by me)

These verses spoke to me tonight in an unpexpected way.
I was looking for a verse to go with the blog I'm setting up and this one popped up in my search of "serve" at "bible.com." I know I have read this passage before, but it really sunk in tonight... the first thing that jumped out was at the end of verse 74 where it says "[That they] Might serve Him without fear" -
For the longest time I've always feared that I won't say the right thing when it comes time for me to really lead someone into a genuine relationship with Christ. That fear comes from many different places, one of those places was the time I was "trained" as a camp counselor. I was still very immature in my faith, and the training didn't seem to express that it wasn't about me saying the right things or verses. I came away with this heaviness around how I was going to "make sure" each child in my cabin knew whether or not she was going to heaven.
What I've learned over the last 6years or so, is that I had a role to play, but it wasn't the main character. The role was to let the Holy Spirit speak through me, and He will do the rest. Though the fear still lingers, I believe that God will use this willing heart however He desires, with or without words.

Thank God, it's not about me!

YWAM.... info...

2007-06-25T00:25:00.000-05:00

A new blog... etc is coming very soon... just thought I'd let you know... I'm hoping to get it going by the first week in July (it's so soon already!!).

Any suggestions for fun adventurous names of the blog?!

in the last two weeks

2007-06-24T23:41:00.000-05:00

I packed boxes.
Went to two grad parties.
Packed more boxes.
Read up on the Belize blog.
Procrastinated packing all boxes.
Mom came over to stop the procrastination.
Had my Dad and Brother in Law move my furniture and some boxes on Father's Day.
Packed boxes with my sister, josh, and sarah's help.
Ate Buffalo Wild Wings for Father's Day Dinner.
Expedited my passport renewal.
Made trips to my house for more stuff to move.
Brought my mom and dad to Erin's Cookie Nook before bringing them to the airport.
Procrastinated UNpacking boxes.
Went to a grad party.
UNpacked some boxes.
Went to another grad party.
Went to dinner to celebrate a wonderful friend.

And here I am at almost midnight...
The Belize team is back, and I heard some stories... they were beautiful stories and I also just looked at some pictures which are equally as beautiful!

Thank you Lord for doing a mighty work in the relationships that were formed and renewed. For showing your Glory in the lives of the students and Belizeans.

it hurts

2007-06-10T22:41:00.000-05:00

my heart

that I have to stay back, and the others get to go to the place I left some of my heart

when you're put in a place that you know you need to be, but desperately want to be in another at the same time

...
the youth belize team is leaving tomorrow morning. i don't know what else to say about it, except that it just hit me today how much i wish i could go. i've said and thought it many times, i just didn't know how it would land when it came down to the day.

i hurt..
i want to be with them
i want to grieve the loss of cindy again without distraction of a youth pastor having been fired the next day
i want to talk to vicky(her mom), but feel like it has been SO long since I've talked to her that now i can't
i want to love on them the best i know how
....

Lord,
give the students eyes to see and ears to hear what you want them to... how they can love on the Ariolas... yet, not overwhelm them.
may vicky and neal feel the love and support and be able to take it in.
amen

Painting Project

2007-05-15T01:18:00.000-05:00

I forgot to tell about later that night! My sister and I were doing this painting project with the kids the week prior and needed to finish. In short, we painted 3 canvases each a diff color to match their bedspread. On each canvas we wanted the kids to put hand and feet prints on with white paint. Seems simple enough, but the hardest part was convincing them that it would look cool, and that it wasn't for their rooms anyways! :)

We first did Sarah's and made a flower from her hand prints and the stem with her feet. (that was the week earlier)... next we attempted to do little flowers with Julia's hands and stems with her feet. The feet worked pretty good, the hands were a WHOLE 'nother story. I wasn't optimistic about the hands, but my sister was determined and in the effort I accidentally clocked her in the eye with the canvas. The whole time Julia was a "bit" upset with the whole fiasco, so my sister finally gave up and we decided to just make "vines" out of her feet marks. Joshua was surprisingly hard to convince at first as well, but finally we made a deal with him and he cooperated. With his we made a "palm" tree... haha get it? Palm tree?!? Haha... okay, bad joke... but it turned out pretty cute!

Such fun times!

Much fun in the land of Tinkerbell birthday parties!

2007-05-15T00:15:00.000-05:00

About a week ago was Sarah's 6th birthday. It was a crazy zoo that my sister and I BOTH learned lessons from. Everything went fine as far as the kids knew, but we weren't prepared as we thought ("we" should be held loosely, my sis didn't expect me to do a whole lot of prep), so while the kids were first showing up we were gluing(sp?) butterflies on sticks to make "fairy wands" and twisting star wire garlands to make fairy "crowns" or "garlands."

While doing so, the girls were running up and down the stairs from the playroom to Sarah's room to the living room. All the while, in the living room "Peter Pan" was playing and in Sarah's room a boombox was playing songs like Pink's "Get the Party Started" sung by some kids band, and that was the favorite song so it was played over and over. Needless to say, it was time to really "Get the Party Started," so my sister decided to pull out Pin the Tail on the "Unicorn" while I finished the fairy garlands. My dad even got in on the fairy garland making action which proved to be a great help in finishing.

After "Pin the Tail on the Unicorn," we had them make their little "wands." I have to stop and say that my sister is very creative... no that's too conservative.. EXTREMELY creative when it comes to crafts for little kids (not to mention, makes the best birthday cakes! decorated and all). I get so stressed out with little kids hovering around me needing help, I could have never decided what would be the easiest thing to make. I don't think these were easy, but Karen sure made it seem pretty easy. After the wand making craft, I handed out their "fairy garlands" and they took a break from structure and had the run of the place while we cleaned up a bit and got ready for the "Tinkerbell Pinãta."
(This is where the fun started (for me atleast).)

For the first hour or so the boys were still hanging around the house helping with whatever they could. But, the plan was for my dad to take Pat and Josh out on the boat while the girls were taking over the house.

The original plan my sister had was to have the Pinãta hang from the basketball hoop, but the boys had already left and they don't have a ladder. I decided that we could hang it from a tree, and I'd just climb up and tie the Pinãta on one of the branches. It was a great excuse to climb a tree, so I was all over it! Litterally. It wasn't too high, but I did use a chair to find leverage. I had forgotten that the tree would be moist, since it had been raining earlier in the day, so as I fenagled my way up (very ungracefully) my pants got a bit dirty and wet. The girls were in a stitch over me climbing and getting dirty. They kept saying "Your feet are all dirty!"

What makes it even more funny (and I think I forgot to tell my sister), was that I thought it was the kind where they were going to hit until they could get candy out. You know, the traditional long-standing way to do a Pinãta. (i bet i don't need to capitalize that! :)) Apparently, they make some now that have strings at the bottom, everyone grabs a string and pulls at the count of 3! It's probably best for that age, but I was expecting to "make it hard" and move the pinãta around so everyone had a chance to try. Thus, the more importance of being in the tree to have that kind of access. The sad part was that we never got a picture of me in the tree, just all the little girlies pulling the strings and then scavanging for the candy and prizes! OF course, it wasn't about me, but it would've been a funny site to see! (you can see my legs dangling down, though)

One of the biggest reasons I planned on being at the party was to do face painting, but I quickly realized that it might not really be needed. The time of the party was 2pm-4pm, and by the time the pinãta was finished, I think it was close to 3:15/30 and we hadn't done presents or cake. Those things went to just about 4, so I painted faces at the end as the moms were showing up. The mom's were all pretty flexible and waited for their kids to get painted, but working under pressure doesn't produce the best results in some cases. Atleast they are only 6 and probably don't have much to compare it to. Sarah kept her purple kitty on her face until monday I think!

It was so fun to see her interact with all her little friends, it's so apparent that she is definitely the social butterfly and is not very shy!

Thanks to those who stuck the whole story out, there was just so much to say! And, that was only SAturday. Sunday was lunch with the family to celebrate... and that was lots of fun, too! But, I'll leave all the details out. :)

party pictures...

2007-05-07T22:42:00.000-05:00

Julia got all cleaned up for Sarah's birthday!

Sarah and her friends making "fairy wands" during her Tinkerbell party.

Presents!
The little girl with the brown hair at the top of the pic had the sweetest squeaky voice and was so petite!)

Happy Birthday Sarah!

2007-05-05T00:13:00.000-05:00

(playing with play-dough in september)

Today is my niece, Sarah's, 6th Birthday! Six years ago to the day, she was born around 5ish... (i'm not her mom, i don't have to remember). One of the happiest days of my life, I had never experienced a birth so closely related, I can't imagine how it might feel one day to have my own children.
This weekend is all about Sarah, tomorrow is a birthday party with her friends that I'll be painting faces, arms, etc. at, along with crowd control in which the last I heard there were 8 who RSVP'd. Shouldn't be too bad :).
Sunday afternoon is lunch at my parents' place with the whole fam, mom dad, gramma, lee, and ant berda. We haven't been all together since Christmas, so it should be a good time to catch up and celebrate a little girl we all love so dearly!

Details shall come after the festivities.

April 30th, already?!

2007-04-30T00:20:00.000-05:00

two things...

I can't believe how fast this month went by!! A month ago this very night/(early morning) I was waiting for a call from my sister to tell me I needed to high-tail my butt up to St. Cloud to see my niece being born. I never got the call, but as planned I drove up at 7:30am. It got me to thinking... (how time flies)... is it because the weather is nicer and that I am more pleased with life overall because of that fact, or is it because I really do get a lot busier? It's probably a combination, in which if so, does that mean if I lived in Florida and had the same life that it would be busier?

I was in Paynesville today playing with the nieces and nephew (i've wanted to say that for a long time :)) and sis and bro in law. It was a delightful time! We played on the computer, ate lunch, played "baseball" after watching the poor twins loose, and painted canvases. Julia of course didn't do much active playing, just the occasional cry and dirty diaper and feeding. My mom got some good pictures with me and the gang... when I get them from her, I plan to promptly post them! :)

Karma with K & C

2007-04-26T22:11:00.000-05:00

If I believed in Karma.... this would be a great example.
The story I am about to tell doesn't have a whole lot to do with me, just something I witnessed with two individuals who I grew up with in youth group. They were the "trouble makers" back in the day and now one has a position with the youth in the church and the other is stepping in as a leader for awhile again. I'll just be calling them K&C, it probably doesn't matter, but owell.

This is how it goes... After youth group on wed. night I saw C and spoke with him about some pictures I found for Seniors Night. As we were talking K interupted and went on to tell C about an incident that happened in his small group room.
Apparently, before K reached his small group room the guys thought it would be fun to light a ping pong ball on fire to see what would happen(i came up with the reason, it's the only one i've figured). I'm a little uninformed about how the fire was put out exactly, or by whom, but in the process there was a large burn mark that was made in the carpet.
Absolutely hilarious. It's nice that K was good enough to give C a heads up before he heard about it from someone else.

Oh, how I wish I could be a fly on the wall inside the family life cubicles on a thursday morning/afternoon!

Here's to all the youth workers of the world! :)

Velvet Elvis

2007-04-09T01:19:00.000-05:00

For the last couple months I have been reading the book, "Velvet Elvis" by Rob Bell. I just finished and have so many things running through my head... good things... hard things... questions.. here is what I have to share about it tonight...

You all know that I have been accepted into a DTS (discipleship training school) program with YWAM (youth with a mission) in Australia. I've had a passion to serve for many years.. the least and lost have always been at the center of my soul. Youth have also been a big passion as well, and the place I have served for almost 10 years. But, another passion that has been simmering in me for the last couple years is serving in the community. I say "simmering" because since the first spark, I haven't done a whole lot about it.

A few years ago I lived in an apartment in Brooklyn Park in a semi-sketchy neighborhood.. Zane and 65th. It was a complex of many buildings, ours was shaped like a "U" and in the middle was a large parking lot. We had a ground level apartment with a patio that went out to the parking . The area was always a swarm with children of all ages... sometimes getting into trouble, other times just playing in the small yards near the patios.
My roomates and I often kept the patio door open in the warm months and the kids seemed to swarm to our patio slab. I decided at some point to buy bubbles and another time a bucket of chalk. It wasn't something I had an agenda for, just a place for the kids to play and have fun.

Why am I sharing this? Well, it's the place where that simmering began, and I've often missed those days... also because "Velvet Elvis" answered a question I always had at those times... and that was... "should I be doing more?" meaning, the doctrine from my counselor days in the summer after my senior year came flooding back. I never felt "good enough" because I rarely sat down with each of my girls to get them to "convert" or "re-dedicate"... I hated that part. I always had this guilty feeling turning in my papers at the end of the week.
Here is a great quote that I always felt in my spirit, that speaks to this situation....

"Oftentimes the Christian community has sent the message that we love people and build relationships in order to convert them to the Christian faith. So there is an agenda. And when there is an agenda, it isn't really love, is it? We have to rediscover love, period. Love that loves because it is what Jesus teaches us to do. We have to surrender our agendas. Because some people aren't going to become Christians like us no matter how hard we push. They just aren't. And at some point we have to commit them to God, trusting that God loves them more than we ever could."
-Rob Bell, Velvet Elvis

I'm not saying here that we shouldn't share our faith, but I want to learn how to do it so that it doesn't have an agenda. That it's me sharing this love that I cannot explain... without asking the person at the end if they want to become a christian, and can you repeat this prayer after me. If the person desires that, I'm trusting that God will speak to their heart. I don't have to be the one to help them say a prayer... I don't have to be there at all.

JULIA ANN

2007-04-07T16:04:00.000-05:00

Sleeping Beauty

One Day old

More to come

Mountain Highs and Valley Lows

2007-04-01T17:15:00.000-05:00

March certainly came in like a lion, and has gone out like a lamb.
Both literally and figuratively.

With the big snow in the beginning of March, came big news of my acceptance into the DTS program with YWAM in Brisbane Australia. Such excitement and mixed emotions, as I wrote about previously here.
About a week later came the news of my dear little girl-friend Cindy Ariola. She passed away one night after battling flu like symptoms on and off for a couple weeks. This was hard news to hear, but we all came together and prayed for her brothers, sisters, mother and father. It was a night of celebration that Cindy would now be walking, running, and singing in heaven.

The following Wed. night was another sorrow filled night... the leaders all sat in our usual meeting and dinner before the evening and received the news that our Senior High youth pastor was asked to resign.. or at that point had just read a letter stating he was leaving. We all sat in disbelief, not having any questions answered, just that he was gone and that we had to keep our faces straight until the night started and the youth were told. It was the hardest night I've ever faced as a youth leader. They gave us nothing, and at the beginning I blindly trusted that the leadership of the church new what they were doing and as the questions came in small group, I held to that belief. Later that night and the next day, the truth in my heart was revealed, and my blogs followed in my confusion and frustration.

The weekend that followed was filled with plans and trying to get ready to go to Colorado for a Ransomed Heart Ministries, "Captivating" women's retreat. It was the PERFECT time to get away and find rest in the arms of my abba father. Although it was hard being away for the next wed. night, not being there for the kids, my own heart needed healing. Before the retreat I met with an old friend in Denver and had some beautiful time re-connecting with her and rest at her house.
There is so much to say about the retreat I don't really know where to start. I met some beautiful hearts... many that were my age and some that were older and wiser. I had time to wrestle with God and be really frustrated and mad, but also time as I mentioned earlier to just sit in the arms of my father. Let him embrace me as I cried out and yelled and carried on... I wanted so much for him to tell me the exact things I needed to do when I arrived home. To start a petition, walk out, change churches, boycott.... but none of those were things He said to me. The words I came away with were Ruthless Trust (which I actually hear is a good book), trusting in him even when I don't understand how I can.... knowing that He is the only one I need to trust... I don't have to trust the leadership of the church, because no matter how hard they try, they will never do things perfectly. It sucks and I hate that.... but we're human and messy... and God's not.
It was a wonderful time to take in God's beauty of the Mountians and make some really great new friends.

I got home last monday with the news that my sister had almost gone into labor the friday I was in Denver. I was most pleased when I heard it didn't happen because I was supposed to be in the room with her this time around. The week at work brought much to do, but it was nicely manageable(sp?).
On thursday my sister was having numbness in her legs and her doctor wasn't being very proactive... long story short, they switched to a doctor in St. Cloud and he was very proactive and scheduled to induce on Thursday. To prepare for this they use gel to "soften" the cervix, to see if that would help her to go into labor on her own. She started on her own, but it suddenly stopped, so late on Thursday night/Friday wee early morning they started the ptosin (i'm sure that's spelled wrong!!). I drove up to St. Cloud on fri. morning and got there around 8:30am.. and she decided she wanted an epideral... it was a long hard night and she needed some relief.
I'll add more details in another post, but she had my beautiful niece Julia Ann at 12:09 pm... what an amazing miracle of life! It was the coolest thing to experience, I wouldn't trade it for the world.

a beautiful symbol of March going out like a lamb, my sweet little Julia Ann..........

pictures to come

trust

2007-03-19T22:07:00.000-05:00

What do you do when you feel like an injustice has been served, but it has been served by the top people... who are they accountable to?

What kind of action can be taken, and how will it be perceived?

Trusting that God has some sort of plan, when the people you are supposed to admire for their faith have made a grave mistake, is really hard.

This is vague... but I'm sure we've all had these situations in the past. This one just feels so huge and out of my control, but like I said HUGE. It's important, and I feel like something must be done.

If you want to know what I'm talking about... just ask anyone involved with the youth at Open Door. I have no time or energy to re-tell it or re-hash it for the hundreth time.

I'm leaving for Colorado... pray that it is a time of renewing and refining... and directing.

God Help me

2007-03-15T22:31:00.000-05:00

Gripping on so tight with the security I have inside
Knowing what is right holding onto my pride

Letting go of the things I hold so dear
Letting go of all my pain and all my fears
Letting go of the things I hold so dear
Letting go of all my pain and all my fears

I have been brought to a place
Where I want to give up everything
Where all I can do is seek your face
And my brokenness I will bring

Holding on to the things I deem so strong
Holding on even tho my faith has been built so long
Holding on to the things I deem so strong
Holding on to what I know

I'm letting go

-Jeremy Camp

Lord, I'm not ready to let go.......
until the truth is revealed and explained

In memoriam, Cindy Ariola

2007-03-12T21:52:00.000-05:00

Cindy died early this morning after being sick for several days. Cindy was the sibling of Raheem, Destiny, Josiah and Sarah. Daughter of Neil and Vicki Ariola.

This is one of the little children in Hopkins Village, Belize, who had brittle bone disease, in whose house I painted characters on the wall. There was a small memorial gathering in her honor tonight.

The time tonight was nice... a good way to remember Cindy and know that she is DANCING and RUNNING around in heaven in her new body! She was only 9years old and full of peace, love and joy. Always wiggling around and "dancing on the table" as music was played, or if we would just sing together. I remember a time where she and Destiny both were asking me to dance all over... one of my favorite old worship songs was playing "The River is Here" I danced and we sang and laughed. What a beautiful expression of worship...

The last night I was with the Ariola family in June and saying my goodbyes, Raheem decided to let me video tape him saying something into the camera. He said, "Bye, see you next, um see you sometime, say hi to everyone." And then Cindy wanted to say something as well, so I video taped her and asked "Okay, what do you want to say?" and Cindy said "I love you so much!"

It's really hard not knowing when I'll be back to Belize to see the family, a team of youth are going in June and if I had the time/money- I'd be there. But, with YWAM, I just don't see it happening. I made that decision long ago, but gosh I so want to be with them now.

If you care to, join me in prayer for the whole family as they greive this loss, one that was much more sudden than expected. My dear friend Vicky Ariola has to be going through a myriad of emotions and my prayer for her is that she would not become bitter- that she would cling to God when it hurts really bad and that her and her husband would be able to hold onto each other in those times as well. Another prayer is for Raheem, he was already feeling a little sick the past few days as well, but with this news has grown weaker. Our prayer tonight was for him to know the incredible value of his life that is yet to live.. that he would hold on and not grow weary! I don't believe that God is done with the ministry of his life! And for Destiny as well, who shared all 5years of her life with Cindy lying next to her... it has to be something she doesn't quite understand. The same goes for their two siblings who do not have the disease, Josiah and Sarah who are caught in the middle with much confusion.
Thank you Lord for the lives you have touched through this family, I pray these things in your name!
Amen

I don't want to end on a low note, because like I said earlier Cindy is dancing and running and laughing in heaven right now... so here's a little anecdote to end this ...

I received the email about tonight at about 7:30, this memorial was already in progress, so I ran out of my house in a bandana, flip flops(it was so nice out today!) and a coat.. okay and a shirt and what not... but I felt pretty stupid showing up late looking like a slob. I was about to paint a canvas, so I had gotten my painting clothes on... there was NO time to change. Owell... at the end Cheryl Skelly took a video of the group because she is going down there on friday. The Ariola's are going to think I ALWAYS wear a bandana... it's like it was meant to be... I was also wearing a shirt that we decorated in Belize with all the village kids that says "belize." Could it have been more appropriate? Only if I had my staple of blue sport shorts on as well.

G'day Mate!

2007-03-11T16:55:00.000-05:00

I'm goin' to Australia!!

Here's my story,

One Sunday last May, Steve Hanson presented an update on Open Door's partnership with World Vision in Kenya&Uganda. In Nairobi, Kenya, we support Dr. David and Ann Kitonga in the Kawangare slum. In the middle of this slum is an island of safety and hope in the school built and run by the Kitongas. In Gulu, Uganda, we partner with World Vision as they serve former abductees of the LRA (Lord's Resistance Army). In the time that Steve presented there was a short video shown of these places, and it impacted me. In the video was a wonderful woman named Nancy, she was on the team with Steve, and a couple years ago I went to Belize with her as a co-leader with the youth. I sat there watching and wondering if that could ever be me and what could I do to be in her position. Anyone who knows me, most likely knows that missions is a big passion... people in general are a big passion.
I saw Nancy after the service and told her that I would love to hear the more personal side of her story in Africa. We soon sat and had coffee together, she spoke of her stories and I listened, and she listened to my stories as well. During this talking the subject of a "DTS" came up, a DTS is Discipleship Training School. The one we talked of though was on Mercy Ships, which is an orginization that transformed a few cruise ships into floating hospitals. They travel to many destinations and onboard with the doctors and crew they hold these DTS's. This conversation got me to thinking and I began researching Mercy Ships on the web and praying.

At the end of June I went on my 2nd missions trip to Belize with the sr. highers, and upon my return scheduled a time to meet with Steve and chat about Belize and Mercy Ships. I was having trouble getting any response from Mercy Ships and wondered just how I'd ever get any information. While talking to Steve, he informed me that the DTS was actually started by YWAM on the Mercy Ships, and that they are no longer affiliated. But, that Mercy Ships still had a program like a DTS. I didn't want to send in an application to something that didn't seem to ever get back to me, so Steve reccomended I search on YWAM's website for a DTS.

This is where I got sort of overwhelmed. There are YWAM bases in hundreds (if not thousands) of places/countries. In one of the searches there was a category for "special focus" and under that was listed "creative arts." VOILA
As I searched under this category it brought up 4 different places... the two I keyed into were Pismo Beach, CA and Brisbane, Australia! I guess art is just associated with warm climates! Ha! :) So, I looked further into them and began emailing different questions... Australia started in Oct. 07, Cali was actually undecided. Australia had many different countries in attendance, Cali had primarily US...

There was a point where I couldn't do much, so it wasn't until after Christmas that I started really emailing the bases again and trying to figure out what I wanted, not to mention what God wanted. That has been the hardest part of this journey so far... this seems hard to say, but I have been struggling with the whole idea of God having a specific "plan" for my life that I might mess up, or the idea of Him blessing the paths that I choose. Does that make sense? What I'm trying to get at is, I haven't heard a direct "Lisa, go to Australia for the DTS" or "Lisa, stay here and be a disciple among the least and the lost right in your backyard"... or even "wait, this isn't the time" - what I have come to believe is that He has put this passion in me, and it's true I could serve anywhere. You don't have to have schooling to make a difference, BUT why not take this incredible opportunity now... I have no attachments, I'm young and only growing older. The plan He has for me is to love Him and love others... that's the greatest commandment, right?! Right...
For awhile, many different fears were holding me back from taking any steps toward starting the application process. But, during a winter youth retreat, I believe God was revealing to me that I had to have a "ruthless trust" or "dangerous wonder"- go and do it and don't worry so much about all those fears. (i think those two phrases are book titles, actually.)

So, in February I emailed the Australia DTS and asked if I turned in my app. by the end of the month, if that would be enough time. They said it would, so during February I made the appointments necessary, got my reference forms out and finished the personal history questions on the application. I accomplished my goal and felt a great peace inside as I brought it to the Post Office. (although, i felt slightly attacked when I locked my keys in the car and it was a huge fiasco. I was supposed to leave for Paynesville with my parents and it screwed our schedule up... but i digress)....

Last Tuesday, March 6th, I received an email from the "Registrar" that I had been accepted to the MAD DTS! (MAD= Music Arts Drama) It starts beginning of October and ends the end of April... that's 7mos. folks! I'm excited, filled with joy, love, a certain peace, anxious, sad, scared, but so happy to have the opportunity to learn how to love so much more and serve the God who lives in me!

I end with this....

It is the cry of my heart to follow YOU
It is the cry of my heart to be close to YOU
It is the cry of my heart to FOLLOW...
all of the days of my life

ODLent.blogspot.com

2007-03-08T22:48:00.000-06:00

Just a little commercial for the blog that Scott set up for Lent and ideas on how to enter into this season... in the beginning it recaps on the Ash Wednesday service if you happened to miss it.

peace -

Lisa

here's a link that'll take you to it,
ODLENT.blogspot.com

so much snow!!

2007-03-04T17:00:00.000-06:00

It has been a wild week and a couple days in weather, eh?! I just thought I'd share a few photos of my adventures in the snow.
The first one is last weekend driving home from Paynesville (30mins. west of St. cloud) at 11:30pm in the blustery snow. We checked MNDot road conditions and it said the roads we were to travel on were fair-good and marked in green. I was with my mom and dad... they drove the Jeep Wrangler up, so we had four wheel drive. My dad was pretty sure it would be okay, especially with the MNDot web reports.
Well... MNDot was wrong! And, I usually don't freak out, but it was a long day and still getting over a cold.. so lets just say I was not happy, and feared for my life the whole ride!

The next couple pictures are from the last snowfall. I got to work fine on Thursday, as did most others, but instead of driving back home after work at 5:00pm (I tried to leave earlier but it just didn't happen) I crashed at my mom and dad's. My dad was gone, so I helped my mom shovel and snow blow... their snow blower is ancient. It's SO hard to push, my arms are still feeling the affects!
Angela and all the other school teachers and kids of the metro got friday off, so she was able to get some great shots of our driveway. I think she took them around 11 and the plows hadn't even done the streets in our developement! There's no way we would've been able to get out.

This one is the view out our front door. Before they came to shovel. Looks pretty cool with all the snow drifts.

This one below is a good perspective in how much snow has accumulated over the last week and a half. Almost to the top of my grill!! Crazy!

On to some photography done by my niece, Sarah! This is Joshua and myself... what a cutie pie!

This one below is probably more funny to me than anyone else. This is Rainbow Brite's puppy, I got it when I was in Kindergarten (pretty sure atleast), and now Sarah is playing with it at grandma's. She took the picture, I think she's an aspiring photographer! :) She also took pictures of her other furry friend stuffed-animals... boo boo kitty, nala, etc.

You Are

2007-02-27T22:32:00.000-06:00

I confess, this started on MySpace... but I think it's a unique little survey that's easy to fill out.. and sometimes really funny!
Now, it's your turn! :)

INSTRUCTIONS
1. Put your music player on shuffle.
2. Press forward for each question.
3. Use the song title as the answer to the question even if it doesn't make sense. NO CHEATING!

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
Stumptown - Nickle Creek

WHAT'S YOUR OUTLOOK ON LIFE?
Llegaron Los Millonarios - Nachito Herrera (sweet.. you should check him out at www.nachito.net)

WHAT DOES YOUR FAMILY THINK OF YOU?
Nothing Compares - Third Day Offerings II

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Ambience - Falling Up

WHAT DO STRANGERS THINK OF YOU?
Sunrise - Norah Jones

WHAT DO YOUR EXES THINK OF YOU?
The Sea - Carbon Leaf

HOW IS YOUR LOVE LIFE?
This is a Call - Thousand Foot Krutch

HOW WILL YOUR LOVE LIFE BE IN THE FUTURE?
After the Rain - Phil Keaggy

WILL YOU GET MARRIED?
Ache for You - Ben Lee

WILL YOU HAVE KIDS?
Take - Heidi Holt

ARE YOU GOOD AT SCHOOL?
My Last Breath - Evanescence

WILL YOU BE SUCCESSFUL IN LIFE?
Wonderful Creator - Paul Wright

WHAT SONG SHOULD THEY PLAY ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I Give You My Heart - Jeff Deyo

WHAT SONG SHOULD THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Hide - Creed

YOU AND YOUR BEST FRIEND ARE:
Trinity - Jennifer Knapp

HAPPY TIMES:
Tender Mercy - 100 Portraits & Waterdeep

SAD TIMES:
If I Could - Jack Johnson

EVERY DAY:
We're So Far Away - Mae

FOR TOMORROW:
(A Quiet Interlude) - David Crowder

FOR YOU:
Somebody's Watching - Toby Mac

WHAT DOES NEXT YEAR HAVE IN STORE FOR ME?
One Last Breath - Creed
(ooh dang, I hope not)

WHAT DO I SAY WHEN LIFE GETS TOO HARD?
Return Of The Singer - Kmax

WHAT DO I THINK WHEN I GET UP IN THE MORNING?
A Beautiful Collision - (B Collision) David Crowder

WHAT SONG WILL I DANCE TO AT MY WEDDING?
Sing Out In Joy - Jennifer Knapp

WHAT DO YOU WANT AS A CAREER?
Diamond in the Rough - Jennifer Knapp

YOUR FAVOURITE SAYING?
Fearless - Falling Up

FAVOURITE PLACE?
Breaking My Heart - Aqualung

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
I Haven't Been Myself - John Reuben

WHERE WOULD YOU GO ON YOUR FIRST DATE?
X&Y - Coldplay

DESCRIBE YOURSELF?
Glo in the Dark - Delirious?

WHAT DO I LIKE DOING MOST?
These Thousand Hills - Third Day

SONG THAT BEST DESCRIBES MY BOSSES AT WORK?
First Time - Hawk Nelson

WHAT IS MY STATE OF MIND AT THE MOMENT?
Shiver - Coldplay

HOW WILL I DIE?
Into The Dark - Ben Lee

THE SONG THAT YOU'LL PUT AS YOUR TITLE
You Are - Kirk Franklin

starting point

2007-02-13T22:26:00.000-06:00

marinating. that is what i described a few days ago to say that i've had many thoughts running through my head on a certain subject. i realized that marinating isn't a great word to describe this because in marinating there comes a point when it is done and ready to cook. maybe it could be right, but to be more specific in what i'm trying to get at... the point is that it's not done, and my wonder is whether it is something that will ever be done.

on to what it is that has been running through my head.

about a month ago now i blogged about "future generations" how i emailed to the "contact us" page at church to see what they mean in using that statement from the pulpit. the response was interesting. it came from al, whom i have a lot of respect for and is a dear friend/mentor of mine. he pointed out several points in our church's vision statement and things they've implemented to fulfill the statement. it is interesting the things you find out by asking questions... and the things that go on that you never really knew.

i responded to him and focused more on the question of youth. why can't they be more present and acknowledged, other than just on an ash wednesday service. i think i responded in more of frustration.. the response back was, "what would it look like for them to feel noticed" (or something to that affect). it caught me off gaurd, because it's a really good question. i have a lot of ideas of how I think they'd want to feel noticed, but i intentionally said from the beginning i didn't want this to be about me.

after some good discussions with some good friends ;).. i continued to wrestle with the questions "what is my part in this?" "am i making this more about what I want instead of what the youth want?" .. in the discussion one of the statements was.. "maybe it's something that we have to sit and wait on" but that is a hard one to digest. we all had involvement in the youth.. part of us is still tied in. there was an investement made, so we still all want to see it. i think the hard part is when i finally decide to stop... where will i see it if it's not in the bigger church body?
these last couple statements just popped out- i guess what i realize is that there is still a passion within me to see the youth change lives... for them to be transformed and for others, especially the "olders&elders" of the church to see what incredible stories they each have to share. so that they know not all youth are punks who have no respect for their elders.

to wrap that all up somehow i'm going to just say that i'm glad i asked the questions. because, if i don't ask the questions, it doesn't get me anywhere. i may not have received the exact answers or any specific ones.. but it leads to new ones... all these questions are pointing me to God and that is the ultimate goal. some of this verbiage and thought is coming from the book "velvet elvis" by rob bell. one of his statements is this
(this pertaining more to questions of God.. the hard ones, like "why does He let bad things happen to good people")

"Questions, no matter how shocking or blasphemous or arrogant or ignorant or raw, are rooted in humility. A humility that understands that I am not God. And there is no more to know.

Questions bring freedom. Freedom that I don't have to be God and I don't have to pretend that i have it all figured out. I can let God be God."

there is a lot of build up and explaining to all of that... but for me, it has been a journey of questions lately. in common christian circles it wouldn't be okay to ask those questions and not get the regurgitated "christian" answer... to abandon that answer and just be okay with the fact that God is the only one that knows.

marinating

2007-02-12T23:24:00.000-06:00

For the past few weeks I've had some really good things marinating in my thoughts. Some things I have been sharing with friends and had some really good convo that brought some interesting views to light. This post is somewhat pointless... only to say that there is something coming... and get ready because it may be long!

oh, my keys

2007-02-09T01:02:00.001-06:00

I went to dinner with my Aunt tonight because it was her birthday. We had a nice time and parted ways. On the way home I decided to return a book to Borders that I realized a couple pages in, it just wasn't me.
Before getting out of the car I reached to the backseat and grabbed the book, made sure the receipt was in it and jumped out hastily as to make a quick exit and bolt into the store out of the frozen parking lot.
As I made my way to the door I realized something wasn't quite right... it was the lack of jingle from my keys. Ah friiik... CRAP.. daNg It (i don't know why, but i still cannot udder an expletive outloud... i do it more often in my head... what's the difference?)... I LOCKED MY KEYS IN THE CAR! Not to mention the spare was IN the car too. Real smart, Lisa, real smart. I had the spare in the car because of the mechanic work last week and never moved them inside!
I proceeded inside to return my book, all the while brainstorming what I should do about this predicament. It would've been easy if I had signed up for AAA already, since it has been on my mind, but that would be too convenient. I decided to call my dad, he knows everything... okay, not everything. Of course I knew what he told me, but it's always nice to get reinforcement, so I called up the non-emergency police line. They were very friendly and sent a nice policeman out to fetch my keys! :) (so, note to self, police in MG have "lock-out" service.. not all cities do)
Actually, two policemen came out... the first one got them to unlock and the second one copied down my license info. While doing so he said, "hey, did you go to Champlin Park H.S." I said, uuh, yeah... (also note that I was in my car and he was on the passenger side standing) and then he said "yeah, so did I, I know you... we went to Champlin Elementary together, too." He told me his name and I was very surprised. It wasn't a very ideal situation to "catch up" so-to-speak, you know, him standing outside in the frigid air without a jacket (apparently they don't wear jackets? what's that about) and me sitting in the driver's seat trying to get my car warm. As I thought about it later, I think I remember that he had a crush on me in grade school. How funny life can be sometimes!
One last thing... if you know me at all.. you know I haven't lived in one place for more than two years in the last 6... that makes about 5moves since I moved out of my 'rents place. The thing I hate doing most with the moves is changing my license. Last place I lived I was due for a new license in the following December, so i waited. This time... I've just put it off until Jan. because I had to get License tabs... perfect!
Good thing I just got my license in the mail on Tuesday!! Pretty sure they could've fined me, even with the new papers showing my renewal... but maybe since I knew the one guy... he'd give me a break. :) haha...

the end...

cars and musicians

2007-02-01T21:51:00.000-06:00

cars are just plain money suckers. it's a losing investment that everyone (almost everyone) has to make and there is no way around it. but why is it that everytime i get to a point in my own financial situation that i can start SAVING, my car decides to suck the money out of me again. i don't ever feel like i can get ahead, but who does, right? i know i'm not the only one in this situation, but it's just frustrating. so yes, more car repairs for me... i guess a water pump is important, since your car won't function and will over-heat without it working properly. (deep sigh)
the end

on to a more positive story

so i've worked with a local musician, brian bates, for a couple of years now. i like to work with people who we've had a history with and who come back because they see the value of our work. brian is one of those people...
i am writing this tonight as a short little tribute to say "thanks." it's refreshing to work with someone who isn't always about business, has a sense of humor and of style, and is grateful for the time and effort we put into a job.

this is a ravecard (musicians business card) i created for him.

his music isn't really my specific style, but as with his design, it is quality! you can check him out at www.brian-bates.com

the practice of patience

2007-01-20T14:53:00.000-06:00

As I made my grilled ham and cheese sandwich for lunch, I thought of a good analogy for patience.

My sister and I were talking this week about grilled ham and cheese sandwiches because they are something she is craving with the pregnancy. She commented about how Pat (my brother in law) makes them really well because he is patient. I agreed and said, I guess that's how him and I are alike. I finally mastered the technique of grilled cheese myself, so I was boasting to her about it as well.

I decided to have one for lunch today and thought of the conversation as I was making my sandwich. But of course, because I was thinking of it, my sandwich didn't turn out. I got distracted by something else in my patient state. I thought that the burner was on low enough, but I didn't check it often enough, and it was black when I finally looked! SHOOT! That patience didn't pay off, but maybe it wasn't the patience that didn't pay off, it was the distraction.

Okay, so if you need an explanation of what I'm getting at.. here it is.. in life they say that "patience is a virtue" etc etc... but if you're not paying attention to what you are patient with, you'll get burned!

haha... get it?!

I know... i'm cheesey... literally... haha... okay okay i'm done!

ooh.. two posts in one day again!

the "next generation"

2007-01-20T14:07:00.000-06:00

Here is what I sent to Open Door on their "contact us" page... having just listened to a great new sermon by Dave... "the way of the rabbi"... it spurred these thoughts again because he again mentioned something about "the next generation".... what do ya think?---

For the past couple years now, I keep hearing from the pulpit that the "next generation" is important, and vital.. etc etc etc. Which I totally agree with and get excited about. My frustration is that there seems to be no instruction or no follow through in these people just saying it out loud. When I hear it, my question is, yeah, okay so?? What's your point... where are you going with that... where is your vision for the "next generation"...?? You can talk all you want about it from the pulpit, but still over half the congregation has no idea what the "next generation" is doing. Or who they are...

Is it the 20somethings... is it the 30somethings... or is it the youth? I suppose it is all of them.

I work with the senior highers... they are an awesome group of people. Why only let them lead a service that barely 1/3rd of the congregation attends? I'm sure there is some explanation of sorts that explains it away... what if this happens, what if that happens.. why does everything have to go through mirads of hoops at a BIG corporate church?

The 20somethings are starting to meet and it seems like a good place to connect, and it is fairly new... so probably needs some time to fester. I don't know...

I think my point to all of this would be, whose responsibility is it for things to change?

This could be a tricky line to walk on... because above all, it's not about the people, it's about the story of Christ in them.. and what he's doing in "the next generation."

I think that's the reason I've had a hard time with addressing any of this, because I don't want it to be a selfish, me- thing.

These thoughts probably aren't as thought out as they should be, but it's the best I've got for now.

I hate it when you've sent something, and then read it later again, (after having read it before you sent it, too) and realize something better to say... but owell... I guess that's why the last line is there.

almost two years

2007-01-17T01:04:00.000-06:00

wow... i took Erin's challenge to look back from the beginning of all my blogs to date. Well, I admit that I didn't get through all of them, but it was interesting to read the ones I got through so far.

One of the highlights for me was reading the one about "Assertiveness vs. Old Fashioned Chivalry"..... It was bascially about my thoughts on dating at the time. After another two years of non-dating... except for one blind-date, my thoughts have changed slightly, but it sure doesn't mean it's any easier.

Here are my thoughts as of late..

This probably is a huge generalization, but I feel like some single christian men are wimps... okay that's really mean i know... so don't take it personally if you know you are not... but I can't understand why guys won't just say hey, let's hang out... and get the ball rolling to get to know someone. Just because you go out on a "date" doesn't mean you are ready to make any kind of commitment. Yes, I get it, it's hard... I've definitely heard the guy's side, but I've heard from a lot of guys who did take initiative... so I KNOW they do exist...
I've done the "hey let's hang out" bit many times and I'm sick of being the one to initiate things. Have I been not assertive enough, after 9 years of working in the youth ministry, and have NO dates??... that's a huge statement to make, because my intent in working with the youth has NEVER been to find a soul-mate. BUT, you'd think that there would be a higher possibility, right? atleast a few dates (that the other actually admitted to calling "dating").
okay so that was a huge rant... that i'll leave for now...

online dating just doesn't work for me...
i want to meet someone in a casual setting.. trying to wade through 20 matches who probably are already pursuing other matches in the first place is not fun! so yes, I admit here publicly that I tried it.. for one week.. (yeah yeah... give it time right... whatever) and cancelled. BUT, cancelling only made it so that I couldn't receive more matches. I continued trying to communicate with a couple, but neither really seemed to click... and I just didn't like the process. There's still this feeling of pressure... and it's a lot of work and time commitment. Of course that's how the dating process is, but in normal circumstances (vs. online) you'd usually only be "dating" and getting to know one guy at a time. (or i s'pose that could be challenged, but you know what i mean).
I don't want your "positive" thoughts encouraging me to give it another chance, unless you've had experience with this... :) (course, I'm sure none of my readers would be in this situation anyhoo... )

let's see... other thoughts...
i'm sure there could be more.. but i believe my caffine buzz from the mango tea i drank at 8 tonight is finally wearing off and i should go to bed so that i'm not cursing at clients under my breath tomorrow from my lack of sleep.. haha.. JK i don't do that!!! (too often, atleast)

back in Black!

2007-01-16T14:17:00.000-06:00

I went to look at both jackets again thurs. night and the Green just wasn't workin for me. I thought I liked it better, but it was too lime-like for me.

I'll put up a picture soon, but wanted to let you all know! :)

I want YOUR vote!!

2007-01-09T22:00:00.000-06:00

I'm trying to decide what Columbia jacket I want... I saw one at Sports Authority for only $112, but it was one of those trendy green colors. I think the exact same jacket is at Dick's Sports, but it's $160 and black and white instead of the green. I'm leaning toward the black, but I'm not sure how technical they'll get with the price match. I have to call tomorrow and see... in the meantime, what color do you prefer... i used a bit of photoshop magic to do this... it's all low-res so it's hard to tell anyhoo... but owell. (i'm such a nerd, it took way too long to pose and get a halfway decent pic)
trendy green... (do you think the color will get old in 5yrs., i want it to last)

more traditional black

I have them both on hold... Sports Authority only holds things for one day... and Dick's for 48hours... HELP! :)

my joshy

2007-01-08T22:58:00.000-06:00

Just a little story about my nephew...

He's a cute little man, and tells it like he sees it. He won't often give you a hug if you ask him to (like if you're leaving and won't see him for awhile), but that's not to say he won't ever give you one either. It's on his terms. I think that's a good quality because you know that when he decides, he really means it.

On New Years day I went to the 'rents house because my sister's fam was there and wanted to play in the fresh snow with the niece and nephew. Well, they didn't have their snow stuff with them since it was pretty brown looking when they left paynesville earlier in the weekend. But, we still played outside but "didn't" play "in" the snow. Or, um, I didn't and they of course couldn't help themselves. We made snow balls and threw them at the house and then at my car, which was pretty dirty. Josh noticed that the snowball spot made it "look" clean, so he took it upon himself to "wash" my car. He was really determined to get it all done, and at one point said, "Anty Lisa, I need help to get this all done"... (I had been helping Sarah shovel snow into the street... or out of the street.. one of the two :)) So, I stopped and helped Josh wash my car.
We played some other games... made miniture snowmen and then decided it was time to go inside. When we were all done and got settled inside, Josh was playing on the chair and said, "I had a lot of fun outside playing! Did you?"
I of course told him I had a lot of fun. What a sweet boy, right? I mean, what 3 year old says stuff like that? Well, maybe many do, but like I said before, when he decides to say something like that, you know he really had fun!
So, even though he doesn't always give hugs before I leave, it doesn't matter so much because he shows his love in his own special way.
Love you Joshy!

(another one of those "moments" he was ready to be done with pictures!)

christmas is over, but this was fun, check it

2006-12-30T00:00:00.001-06:00

I love "A Charlie Brown Christmas"... and I found this fun little quiz about the show through another blog... I scored 60%... not terrible... atleast better than half. :)

click the picture >><< to take it yourself...

how'd YOU do?

Don't dis the JuJu- episode 21/season two

2006-12-28T23:56:00.000-06:00

I admit it, I'm obsessed. consumed. hooked. immersed in. addicted... to Grey's Anatomy. Yes, I confess here and now that I have a problem. Is it that much of a problem? Well, I'm not having dreams about McDreamy yet, but when I rent a disc from Blockbuster I definitely can't stop watching after just two episodes. It has to be atleast three, and it's hard to quit after that.

I'm so glad that I've been able to watch the second season on dvd while we're waiting for new episodes to return in the current season.

Anyone else ready to admit to their obsessions? :) For some it's alcohol, and others cigarette's... me: Grey's Anatomy.

---
In other news.. I never updated about my "final" last friday! :) It went exceptionally well... no big deal, I just didn't give any of my opinion. And, this week I found out that the client wanted to get rid of the current logo that was created by someone else and let me change it. Sometimes if you do what they say, even if you don't like it, they'll see it for themselves and decide that maybe, just maybe you were right. :)

--
One last tid-bit... all this week I thought how great it would be if I could take friday off, but at the same time figured it wouldn't be a hard day and I'd have work to do so why not? Well, this afternoon my boss came into my office and said "I want you to take the day off tomorrow"..
Perfect! If he is telling me I should, who am I to do anything different! :) yay... a day to catch up!
So... the moral of the story is.... "don't dis the juju"
haha

peace- and Happy New Year if I don't get on here again before!

CHristmaS Meme...

2006-12-21T22:48:00.000-06:00

Okay Erin... I of course, cannot resist the "meme"
here's the definition for all who are curious... i had to look it up:
meme: an idea, behavior, style, or usage that spreads from person to person within a culture

1. Egg nog or Hot Chocolate?
Hot Chocolate! Egg Nog just sounds nasty

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree?
Santa only brings the stocking stuffers...

3. Colored lights on tree/house or white?
Currently green and red on tree... none on the house

4. Do you hang mistletoe?
Naw... i never got into that... nobody to kiss anyways :)

5. When do you put your decorations up?
very soon after Turkey day

6. What is your favorite holiday dish?
hmm... it's always different.. this year it's a ham from the Honey Baked Ham Co.- my dad got a GC for one... i suppose it'll be good, but I'm not a huge ham fan in general

7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child.
hmm... i don't now if it's absolutely favorite, but one I remember vividly... I asked for ice skates (i knew we were friends for a reason E! :), but I got new ones... sorry) for christmas one year and the next morning before going to my grandma's house, I was determined to try out my new skates. My parents were so great... they brought me to an ice rink even though it was closed and helped me get my skates on in the car so I could go and try them out. I believe it was close to 0° out, too! So, needless to say the skating didn't last very long!

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa?
Santa was "old saint nick", a real person, but a story from long ago, I was told by my parents early on. I was probably one of the oblivious kids who didn't realize my friends REALLY believed in Santa, and broke their little hearts.

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas eve?
I open ALL of them on Christmas eve... we used to do christmas with mom's side on the eve and dad's side on day... but you know, family feud and all that, so the eliminated the day celebration.

10. How do you decorate your Christmas tree?
being a single gal, i don't have many ornaments... i haven't asked for my christmas ornaments from my parents because I felt like I should wait until I have my own family. Just makes more sense on their tree right now.

11. Snow! Love it or dread it?
As you may have read... I posted in the middle of my work day today JUST to report the snow that FINALLY fell! It was ABOUT TIME! Yes, I love it... I was actually getting depressed from the brown-ness.

12. Can you ice skate?
I got new Ice Skates two years ago, or maybe even three now.. wow! but I haven't had a chance to use them in a couple years. :(... that is one of my goals for the year.

13. Do you remember your favorite gift? (hold on, this one's long)
oh gosh... this is a funny/heartwarming story :)... it's mostly my favorite because of the story..
so, in middle school i was pretty obsessed with Elmo (i know you know where this is going). And, of course when the Tickle Me Elmo came out EVERYONE had to have one, but I really never remember asking for one outright... Everyone remembers the mobs and people stealing them out of customers hands, etc. It was insane and I couldn't imagine why it was SOO important to have it for Christmas. OKAY... so I open most of my gifts and then get to one from my grandma, open it, and yes, it's "Tickle Me Elmo"... I was shocked! She told me that she went to Target and got a RainCheck (because they were obviously out), not thinking it would come before Christmas and would just wrap a picture of it or something. Target called her a few days before Christmas, so she was able to pick it up for me. I remember her saying something like she was a bit frightened that someone would see her carrying one out of the store. I just LOVE my grandma! Not because I got something, but because of the heart behind it... she knew without me asking, and didn't worry about having to give it on Christmas... "it's the thought that counts" is her moto.

14. What is the most important thing about the Holidays for you?
Family. (i'll second that!)

15. What is your favorite Holiday dessert?
mmm... Grandma's special creme wafer cookies... they're indescribable!

16. What is your favorite Holiday tradition?
a newer tradition is having Mike and Lois(our "adopted" aunt and uncle) over for gift giving and dessert on christmas day (although this year will be slightly different because of schedules... owell)

17. What tops your tree?
nothing... couldn't find one I liked that lit up

18. Which do you prefer giving or receiving?
i gotta be honest i like both equally... especially receiving a creative gift... it tells you about the person who is giving them... like last year, my sister burned three different compilation cds for me... fun songs, worship songs, and quiet songs.... the fun songs was so awesome... a bunch of oldies that we used to dance around the house to... how fun!

19. What is your favorite Christmas song?
oo, i have a few... The Little Drummer Boy (i loved the rup a pum pum parts as a kid), Carol of the Bells, and that song from ELF that Will Ferrell sings with that girl in the bathroom to... something like... oh yeah, Baby, it's Cold Outside :)

20. Candy Canes! Yuck or Yum?
i could take 'em or leave 'em... i haven't had one in a long while actually

well... as the definition of "meme" is spreads from person to person, whoever reads this is supposed to do the same thing... so maybe David or Linda could do this, since Erin already did it... i'm pretty sure there are only three of you who frequent my blog anyways! anybody wanna prove me wrong?

winter wonderland!

2006-12-21T14:09:00.000-06:00

YAY! It'S SnOWinG!!!!!

i'm sure it is causing problems which is bad... but I'm so happy!! :)

a few more short stories

2006-12-20T22:47:00.000-06:00

It has been awhile since my last post (for me atleast)... and since Erin nudged me by asking WHERE I was... well... here's some facts of the month :)

1. i've been using my creative juices on a fun christmas postcard and some other creative endeavors on my computer

2. been christmas shopping and painting... painting things for gifts

3. been having some trouble with pains in my arms, wrists, hands

4. just plain stressed

Because of numeral 3, I am keeping this short, especially since I already blogged one long story today.
I did want to share about a sweet gift I got at our office christmas party..

Every year we do a Secret Santa gift exchange.. Angela(my roomie) laughed because there are only 5 of us... what a nerd, it's still secret even though the quantity of us is low! :) k... anyways... You never quite know what you'll get.. we do just one gift (some do it throughout december... we don't, just a $10-15 gift) anyhoo, why am I explaining all of these details...
My boss's son, Dave had my name and got me the new "U218 VIDEOS" being a big u2 fan- it was perfect. I popped it in while writing my last blog, and I had to stop so many times and watch. This is a DEFINITE must for any u2 fan... well, in my opinion atleast.
I'm sure they've had other DVDs or music video colaborations, so I don't have anything to compare it with, but it's cool because there are videos from '84, and ranges in between until now. I know you'll probably never read this Dave... but thanks again! :)

I think there was more I wanted to write... but I forget and I better stop before I have those pains I was talkin' about.

later blogland..

p.s. man, i was all excited to switch to the new blogger, but I guess you have to be "chosen" to switch... lame.

Wish me luck!

2006-12-20T21:57:00.000-06:00

I thought I was done with finals when I finished school...

One of the things I'm working on right now is a presskit for a musician (a promotional tool to send to radio stations, etc.). This particular musician and I are having a creative conundrum(sp?).. I don't know one word to describe it, but basically I keep thinking I understand what she wants, and then somehow I totally miss the mark. This usually doesn't happen very often, and I believe I'm starting to get it now, but the test or "final" so-to-speak is friday at 3pm.
Guy talked to her and decided it would be good if she came in and sat down with me to work on it together. I'm sure it is a good idea too, but it's a designers worst nightmare... having someone sit and watch you create.. i'm getting the jitters just thinking about it... it's like having someone look over your shoulder while reading a good book, or writing a letter. An eagle on a perch, watching its prey. They get to see each and every move you make.. no matter how fast or slow. Talk about pressure...
I decided it would be good to ask Georgia about the subject since she had our "favorite" client for so long perched at her side for hours and days. The advice she gave me was this... You have to ignore the need to please them every second and not worry about how long it takes to get a concept out. That's the paraphrased version. I think it's true and good advice, but it might be easier said than done. I think she has this skill mastered... me on the other hand, these things come up few and far between.
The other small piece to this story is that I feel like I might have offended this person at one point in the process. I was trying to let them know that I just didn't think the concept they were explaining would work well. I may have said, it just wouldn't look good... with a little too much emphasis on the "just" and "good." I can't really remember, but I remember that I heard some slight frustration in reply to my comment. I'll be the first to admit that sometimes my communication skills are lacking, and this was one of those times. How do you recover from that, especially if you don't know for sure if it really affected them or not. Part of me wants to say, "okay, so let's just start over, pretend you've never talked to me before." Or, I could just say... "I'm sorry for all this miscommunication on your design concept.. I believe we can still make this partnership work"- okay, so I'd never be that formal... but you know something along those lines.

I praying it goes well... that I'll be able to relax and be creative. no pressure lisa, no pressure! :)

twenty six

2006-12-01T17:00:00.000-06:00

Twenty Six years ago today, at this moment (5:00) my mom had just gotten to the hospital and was in labor with me.
When I was a kid, my dear great grandmother always told me the story of how she rushed my mom to the hospital as she was in labor. (and made it sound like she saved the day, -insert misty eyes- she was the coolest old lady, how i miss her!).

As my mother wrote in my baby book...

"Gr. Grandma Dorothy took mommy down to the hospital at 4:30pm. It was cold and windy out, started snowing later that night. Met Terry (daddy) :) as I got out of the car. Went to admitting, a nurse from OB came and got me. Went to the birthing room, Terry came up shortly. Labor lasted five hours, Lisa came out sideways."
(may that explains my sideways thinking! :)haha)

I was born at 8:00pm.. and the other memory or story I know is that "Little House on the Prairie" was on tv when I was born, as my mother always told me. :)
___

I took the day off today and it was very nice... I'm off to go shopping now and to hang with some friends... but here is another song that I really love the lyrics to... somewhat appropriate to this day as well...

Better Days
(John Rzeznik- goo goo dolls)

And you asked me what I want this year
And I'll try to make this kind and clear
Just a chance that maybe
We'll find better days

'Cause I don't need boxes wrapped in strings
Designer love and empty things
Just a chance that maybe
We'll find better days

So take these words
And sing out loud
'Cause tonight's the night
The world begins again

I need someplace simple where we could live
And something only you could give
And that's faith and trust and peace while we're
Alive

And the one poor child who saved this world
There's 10 million more who probably could
If we all just stopped and said a prayer for them

I wish everyone was loved tonight
And somehow stop this endless fight
Just a chance that maybe we'll
Find better days

twenty four

2006-11-22T22:22:00.000-06:00

I've always loved the switchfoot song "twenty four"
here is an artistic expression with an excerpt of the song..

Passion

2006-11-16T22:30:00.000-06:00

Tonight's Kare11 Extra touched me... in many ways..

In short, it was about an artist who paints portraits of fallen soldiers, and gives them to the families. She doesn't charge the them, she does it because she is passionate about it.. that's what I heard from her story atleast. This is the blurb that Kare11 wrote up about it:

"The artist, Kaziah Hancock, is not political, she doesn't want anything in return, just the satisfaction of knowing that in some small way, she's helping heal the pain some American families are left to bear after losing a loved one in war."

It hit at my very soul.. not because it's such an amazing thing to do (though it DEFINITELY IS) for free, or because she is so talented and I love art (course, it didn't hurt), it's because of the very passion that exuded from her. If I am able to live long and old, I hope in my older days I get to do what I love with that kind of passion. If you didn't catch the story, click on the link for a preview of what they showed. (It doesn't do it any justice, I though that it was going to be the whole segment, I don't think it will be and there may be a short commercial first)

The Art of Compassion

i voted!

2006-11-07T21:54:00.000-06:00

You can all rest assured that I put my annoyances behind me and voted today! I don't think I really would have not voted, but I wish we could vote on a new way of getting the information to people. Whatever happened to the truth? Why can't politics be explained better without having to do so much research to make sure you know what your voting will get you.

Maybe it is laziness on my part. I should make sure I'm more informed, instead of just voting along party lines, but atleast I did my civic duty. No matter how the election turns out, I'm glad I know that ultimately God is the final vote when I leave this place in the dust!

Thus ends my political banter and blogging. I hope you've enjoyed my non-researched views on DECISION 2006! (tee hee)

2006-11-07T00:11:00.000-06:00

This was a great show!

Is it Nov. 8th yet???

2006-11-02T21:48:00.000-06:00

I am so sick of this political season... I honestly cannot wait until it is over. I am not into politics AT ALL. I'm especially sick of the "unknown" calls I keep getting on my phone from the Republican party who doesn't even let you get a word in edge-wise. I've gotten two calls so far, you'd think I'd learn to not pick those calls up, but calls from the church also show up as "unknown." It's enough to make me just not want to vote... the only thing I'm interested in voting for is the "VOTE YES" License Amendment or whatever you call it. Unless there are some hidden bad things they're not saying about this... I'm all for our tab tax money going to make the roads better or wherever it's coming from. See, I can't even keep all the specifics down.
I'm not even sure where I'm supposed to vote and haven't receieved anything in the mail, maybe I would've if I changed my address on my license already. But, Angela hasn't received anything either, so I don't think that is the ticket. Who knows... all I know is that, as I said before, I'm ready for it to be next wednesday.. then I can watch my favorite shows like Grey's Anatomy in peace, without politcal basher ads.

Well... that's it for now... I think I might actually go to bed early tonight. Have a wonderful weekend everyone!

here's a funny picture from a few weeks ago when i went apple picking with the senior girls. there were a couple of llama's and goats in a little pen. How cute! I was thinking of that story book, "are you my mother?" when i wrote the caption. :)
Llama for Govenor!

Birds and Spiders

2006-09-28T23:36:00.000-05:00

Two "random" stories for you from today...

Numeral Uno-
As I look out the window by my desk there is an old house directly to my right. It's actually the backyard of a house that used to have two older ladies inhabit it, who were keen on feeding stray cats, various birds, and really any other creature that needed a home. This house was often a bit of entertainment in our computer sucked day.
Recently we've noticed that the ladies are in the process of moving out, but it has been in stages. There are no longer any dog/cat houses or bird baths in the backyard, nor has there been any laundry hung out to dry (as there had been in the past).
However, the birds were definitely present today, and apparently very consumed with the berries on the Juniper tree that stands about 5-10feet from my window. I think they had some halucinigens(sp?) in them, because in the time between about 11:30 until 4:00 7 birds proceeded to fly into our windows. It was quite the entertainment, and EVERY time, caught me by surprise! I was pretty close to losing it after awhile... not to mention my day was pretty hectic to begin with, must have been something in the air. As we say around the office... it was a Thursday.. (if anything ever goes wrong, it's THURSday!). I took a picture for some proof of these wako birds... the last one hit so hard, it left a feather on the window.. excuse the blurriness, I couldn't get the macro focus to work.

Numeral Dos-
Tonight, after watching my Thursday night line up.. I decided to catch up on some emails, etc. As I was minding my own business typing away I looked to my left and in the corner of the wall by my desk were two ugly spiders. They looked like two different types... one was like a mini-daddy long legs and the other just an ugly spider with a large body and not as long of legs as the other. I've developed this fear of spyders... not so much that I'll start freaking out and crying, but freaking out and yelling curses at them. I frantically found the RAID and sprayed them while squirmishly hoping they wouldn't fall off the wall and go crawling into a hole. I was lucky, they stuck to the wall and I promptly grabbed a napkin to squish their ugly little bodies. (iihhllll blech) I was again typing away when Ang yells, "EEWW, there's a BIG spider over here, help".. I came over with the RAID and squirmed and again yelled curses at it... I HATE HATE HATE them! How have I done missions all these years you may ask? I just suck it up and occassionly have to do the same thing... and sometimes loose sleep over wondering if a spyder is going to crawl up my leg and who knows where else... blaaaclkloaklkiosh*&#)_!
Getting back to Angela's incident... so I came with the RAID and couldn't bring myself to spray it because it was big and I didn't want it to jump off the wall after spraying it and touch me. I kept trying and then Ang grabbed the bottle from me and sprayed it... the spider then fell to the floor and Ang sprayed it a few more times and once it was dead in a heap she sprayed it once more for good measure. Ang tried to tease me, but I reminded her who yelled for help 3mins prior to that moment. I went to call our management to tell them AGAIN that we found spiders. Plunkett's came out and sprayed about a month and a half ago.. you'd think that should last, but I guess with the weather and all, they're looking for warm places... I DESPISE SPIDERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! God help me if I find another spider tonight, I might just break down and start crying... MIGHT... only might.
So, here's a pic of that bigger spider all balled up and grimacing... okay maybe not grimacing... i put a pen cap there so you can tell the size better :).

The Search is OVER! (WARNING: this post may be long!)

2006-09-15T00:01:00.000-05:00

I am now the proud owner of a Black '98 Chevy Malibu. Yesterday at this time, if you would've told me that, I would've laughed in your face. You see, for the last week and a half I have been diligently looking for a Honda/Acura/something foriegn car. Why? Well, most people know that Honda's have an impecable reputation in quality and endurance. Or, shall I say, they last forever! So, I knew going into my search I wouldn't find any that were much newer than a 96/97... actually I was surprised to find those years in my price range.
I let a decent Accord slip through my fingers on Tuesday night... 95 with all the features I was looking for plus a couple extras.. my standards were power locks/windows/cruise... not a very hard order to fill. That Accord had leather interior and moon roof... and it was in solid working order, but my dad wasn't back quite soon enough and I didn't feel comfortable buying without him. SHOOT...

Having my dad back yesterday was comforting, but I was still kicking myself about that other car... I was anxious all day yesterday, but trying my hardest to trust that God had something else in mind. It was the first night of youth group last night and before I went, my dad and I looked at a silver 97 Accord, but we found out WHY it was in my price range. Something was making noise whenever we turned the wheels right or left.. we got back to the guy's house and he said, "yeah, it's about a $250 fix"... well, that would've been nice to know BEFORE we test drove it, be honest atleast before someone takes it out. Atleast we could know that and not feel like you're covering it up. anyways... I was not in a good mood when I got to church and on top of that I was really hungry and there was only over-cooked frozen pizza left over. I vented to a few people and then decided I needed to try and stop thinking about it and think about the night. Worship was at the end of the night, and it really helped me to focus on what really matters and truly trust that God has my best in mind.
It was hard falling asleep last night, I almost came and posted, but eventually fell asleep. I couldn't get my mind off the fact that my car was going to be taken away and I had nothing to fill its spot. (hey E- no apostrophe after it, right?! :)) I prayed myself to sleep because I got myself all worked up again and anxious again, it's all I could do to get it off my mind.
The drive to work was surreal, realizing it was the last time driving that car to work, or anywhere for that matter! You can read my previous post for more details on how it felt to give up my car.
Okay, so I'll jump ahead to tonight. My dad had called on a couple more Honda's and a couple VW's (one Golf, one Passat). One of the Honda's was in New Hope, so we swung by there and gave it a wirl, decent good driving car with not bad miles.. just really scaled back no power anything, not even a cd player and no cruise. Good car if all came to worse... so, then it was off to Jim Lupient's Bargain Lot. My parents have bought 3 cars there in the past 15-20 years and they've always been good, so we checked their stock. As we walked through, I noticed a 97 Acura Integra with leather interior and just a bit above my price range, but possibly negotiable. I started getting excited, but when we took her out for a spin noticed again, why it was priced lower. No AC working and a couple other little things that would all add up to atleast 500=1,000, so we passed on that. Next was the car I am driving now, which is funny because I wasn't too interested in it when he first suggested it, but when we looked closer it had everything I was wanting PLUS more. The drive was really nice and I was pleasantly surprised. We got back to Lupient's and asked about the CD plate because it wasn't in the car, so we tested it out and it sounded really good. There was one other Honda that my dad thought we should maybe look at, more for me because he didn't want me to always "wonder" or have a "what if." The only downfall was that it was located in Woodbury/Maplewood(can't remember which)... he was willing if I really wanted to go, so we were on our way and as I kept thinking, the Honda was a 94 with 150k miles and only 2door... it just didn't make sense for us to go all the way out there. I had this peace about just saying, you know I think I should just take that Malibu... so we exited the 394 exits into Downtown Mpls, turned around and headed back. Just for the sake of it, we went to look at the Passat at Westside VW, and I knew that was definitely not for me.. older and really boxy.. no like.

So, there's another whole story as to what happened after we left the VW dealership and buying my car at Lupient, but I'll spare you that tonight. If you're interested in a funny story, ask me another time :). Here's the cool thing about this search. I kept praying about not getting my hopes up, or having high standards about this car that I'm not sure how long I'll keep. Knowing it was going to get me buy for only a year or two, I didn't want to be picky. The thing is, he knew what I really wanted and knew that I would be okay without having those things, but I got all of my requireds and more. Here's the details... cruise- check, power locks- check, power windows- check, cd player- check (nice one, plus a cassette deck?! funny), moon roof- sweet, power mirrors both sides- double sweet, key-less entry- nice, LEATHER- rockin'...
The only possible downer is that it might need new roaters or pads, but my bro-in-law can do those for less than $50!
As I drove my new car home I had this thought as I was praying over my car for it to last me... it was this... My God takes care of me, and why NOT ask for what you really want because he really does care about the little things. This whole journey of finding a car really parrallels with finding the man I want to marry. Don't take this wrong... the whole "trying out" and those details are not what I'm saying... what I'm saying is this: I was worried and anxious about finding the car.. thinking I turned in my old one too soon... nope. He had one waiting for me... it wasn't exactly the "model" I was looking for but it had all I wanted and more. That sounds a little strange to me, but it just resonated.
One more little thing.. I've never named my cars before.. never... and this may be odd especially to post it on the world wide web, but owell... for some strange reason I had the word "prince" pop into my head, so I think I'm going to "dub" my car a male and call him my prince! :) It's cheesy, but then again, I laugh at cheesy jokes... and I can be cheesy.. so there. The End.

over a car!!

2006-09-14T13:01:00.000-05:00

Farewell my sweet, Sunfire!
You will be missed...

If you've ever seen the movie "As Good As It Gets" you may remember the part where Jack Nicholson is in his condo playing the piano... saddened because his neighbor just took back his dog that Jack was watching. I'm feeling just a bit like him right now, as the Insurance Salvage people took my car away... sniff, sniff...

Over a CAR... A stupid Car
(just picture Jack Nicholson saying it) :)

I never thought I'd be attached to a car, but as i was lying in my bed trying to fall asleep, i realized that it's because I bought that car and paid it off... it's the one I've had the longest. I actually owned something of significant value. I know I'll own my next car too... but all that dedication to the payments, etc... (sigh) It'll be okay... once I finally get a new (to me) one!

Hail Damages

2006-09-10T16:52:00.000-05:00

Both physically and emotionally!

On August 24th, around 1:00pm, the sky opened up and poured forth rain and hail. This is my story.
I was working at my computer and looked out my window to watch the rain for a moment and noticed some hail. I've seen hail before, but I had yet to take a lunch, so I went out to the front doors and watched the hail fall from the sky. While watching it was aparent that this was not your normal 30 second hail burst. It kept getting bigger... and bigger... and bigger... and last, and last, and last. Is it possible to call this phenomenal, without giving the sense that it was good, because it was the opposite of anything positive. Except that I was in awe of the scene and I couldn't move, adrenaline was rushing through me. gluing my eyes to the scene. I couldn't believe what I was seeing and eventually HEARING on the rooftops. Everyone else in the building also eventually came out to the front and we stood together just stunned... watching our cars getting dented.
About 10 or 15mins went by and as we watched the hail grow from ping pong size to tennis ball size, we grew worried about our well being. From time to time we'd hear it hit our office windows, but just when we were worried if our office windows would blow in, we saw the back windows of cars being busted. I was so shocked and nervous, my response was to laugh... it was not a laughing matter, but it was seriously like watching a movie. I couldn't believe it.
It finally finished and we all went out to assess the damage. Three broken windows (only out of 8 cars) and atleast 6/7 cracked windshields (mine included), and too many dents to even count. Large dents, large enough that PDR (paintless dent repair) may not even fix.
My car only suffered a cracked window, but MANY large dents everywhere. I figured it was going to be a hassel to get fixed, but wasn't too worried because my deductible wasn't too high. Well, I brought it to the adjusters last Tuesday and they had another story for me... it's considered a "total loss" because the value of my car is less than it would cost to fix. WHAT? I sat in my car waiting for the adjuster to come back with a copy of the papers and couldn't believe it. I had just finished payments on my car.. it's mine and I'm not ready to get rid of it, even if it never had any special features... power locks/windows, etc. I don't want a car payment! Tears burned my cheeks, LORD, this was NOT my plan, now what? ...pause... no answer... well... maybe i could find a car that has more features.. maybe... but i still like my car with my Belize and Haiti oval stickers on the back...
and the song... "letting go" runs through my head... okay okay... (not to over-spiritualize, tho... those were just rambling thoughts of mine)

anyways..
They said I could keep it, but we figured out it really wouldn't benefit me. Car shopping SUCKS! Especially when you don't haev a lot of options or time. The timing was awful too, because my dad went out of town on business the day after I found out. How convenient... just another reason it'd be nice to have a man around... OWELL.. another learning experience that must be done as a single woman... I guess it makes me more assertive and tough... or just more annoyed that life is just life sometimes and you have no control.

SO... that's the latest... my time lately has been spent on autotrader.com and carsoup.com... i just got the tip to go on Kraig's List, Perfect! another site to waste time on... :)

at some point i may get some pics of my dented car up here...

Blogger beta?!

2006-08-20T23:22:00.000-05:00

Just curious if any of you have switched to the new "blogger beta" version... I haven't had time to read much about it, but all I know is that it's annoying because now my "default" username and password picks up my Google mail account info. I didn't have my Blogger account info memorized, it usually came up automatically so I had to search for that info, what a pain. So, now I know what I have to do, but what do you guys think... have you switched to the "beta" version...

just curious... when i have time i guess i'll check up on it myself... always good to have others thoughts though...

well, i haven't updated in awhile... i should do that soon... until then,
asta la vista

photoshop fun

2006-08-13T02:07:00.000-05:00

i've decided i need to do my own fun once in awhile with photoshop... instead of always doing what other people want... here's my first fun... i hope Ms. Dyson doesn't mind me using apart of her poem... i just googled "flying poem" and it got me to her. This is the same picture that is below in my "chi-town" post.

Woah, this is truly wild... the original color scheme is a bunch of blue tones and the color behind the text is black. However, when I uploaded it to blogger, the colors changed to what you are seeing. I actually love the colors, except I'm not sold on the green/grey color behind the text. I can't get over the fact that it changed on me... maybe because I didn't convert it to RGB before making it a jpeg, but still I've never seen this happen... okay... i'm done. enjoy

chi-town

2006-08-09T22:51:00.000-05:00

another fun excersion to chicago was had this past sun-tues. it was actually rather un-expected. i hadn't planned on going this year. mostly because i didn't really have vacation days and didn't want to borrow them from next year, like i did last year. (that was a mouthful) But, Scott bargained with me, and it was a good offer so I took it and was in! it's always a great trip, aside from sleeping on the floor with an air mattress that looses air during the night. AND this year we had the pleasure of a few girls feeling the need to gab and giggle until 2am... i was the lucky one who couldn't fall asleep! oh, the joys of leading the youth.... tee hee...
seriously though... i LOVE Six Flags... I think I described the two best rides EVER last year in my account of this trip, so if you'd like another explanation here's a link to that post.

A couple fun stories are as follows...

Every year we make an annual stop at Gino's East pizza... it's the pizza with the sauce on the top and cheese on the inside. They have a fun environment for a group of highschoolers... they encourage writing on walls, chairs, table cloths and whatever else you find to write on.
Just after we got our pizza, Dan (another leader) asked for some of that pizza pepper stuff, so I grabbed one off the next table and gave it to him. I was looking for the Parmesean cheese when I heard laughing, I turned around and the WHOLE jar of pepper junk was ALL OVER his plate. It looked like someone had douced it with red/orange/yellow confetti! I laughed so hard as he tried to play it cool and say he'd still eat it... He ended up not eating it, realizing he could probably get really sick with all of that in his stomach. Instead, he dared another kid, Sean, to put a bunch in his mouth for 30seconds... but then spit it out. That was less funny, but still entertaining... those guys will do anything for attention! :)
I so wish I had a picture of that pizza, it still makes me laugh!

The next story comes from our day at Six Flags. It was about mid-day/afternoon and most of the group I was with wanted to go to the waterpark. Diane and I didn't bring our suits in, and had to wait until the bus came back at around 5 to get them, so we went on Superman. It didn't take too long to get through the line, and I had already been on the rides I was really excited for, so we walked leisurely through the park to kill some time. While walking, Diane mentioned that she wondered why we were really needed on the trip in times like these. I agreed that sometimes leaders on this senior high trip seem pointless during the day. Just a few minutes later we found a girl who had "lost" her group or they lost her, unfortunately I'm still not sure which is more true. Let's just say, she's got a lot of energy... and tagged along with us for pretty much the rest of the day. We did end up hooking up with Scott and a few others to mix things up a bit for the evening. It was just so funny the timing of Diane's comment and our little friend joining up with us.

Before we left the Chicago area on Tuesday, we took a jaunt into the city and camped out at Navy Pier. In years past, the tradition has been to walk the shops of Michigan Ave., but we thought it would be fun to shake things up and go to the pier instead. In my opinion, it was a great change and felt more relaxing. (though i'm sure we would've walked just as much, if we had gone to Mich. Ave.) Here are a couple pix from Navy Pier... one is of the Ferris Wheel that I opted not to spend $5 on, and another pic of water jumping fountains in the arboretum.

Excerpt from my journal, one month ago.

2006-07-21T20:41:00.000-05:00

Wed. June 21st

Had a better night sleep, work up just before the alarm. Went to breakfast and had a quick pow-wow with Scott, G and Leah. Decided who was going where, then we had a short devo- Scott told us a "story" to put ourselves in- asked us, what burdens we need to let go of, to give to God.
I had a hard time pin-pointing mine - kind of knowing one, but not knowing how to let it go fully. So, it's something I'm sitting in and asking God to reveal how/what etc.
I took a group of kids, Em, Kristen, Blake and Shireen to ARiola's. Talked to Vicky for a short time and then went back with Blake to find Scott. He was going to send a couple of people with me to make visits to a couple of the older people in the village. We got back and Scott was a bit discouraged about not having jobs for everyone to do right away. But eventually Herdie came and they went into Dangriga to buy paint and start painting the church there. Blake, Josh, Sarah, and I chilled ate lunch and waited for Em, Kristen and Shireen to come, but then Josh, Sarah and I decided to walk down to make sure they were coming back or that Vicky hadn't forgotten to wake up from her nap. :) She did, but Shireen(the school teacher, not team member) got there, so that's when they left.
We hung around the beach until about 4:00 beacuse we thought ght kids didn't get out of school till then, but we were wrong. So at 4pm we took all the clay buckets and went to the "shed" which is like a big long hut with no walls. It was a bit chaotic at first, bu tthen we just started having fun and making animals/ cars and planes for them all. It was really a blast! But, dinner came sooner than later and we had to quit a little pre-maturely.
--

(excerpts copied as written at the time... you can see my shortened and not so eloquent way I journal)

Preach it

2006-07-20T20:05:00.000-05:00

Okay, so tonight as I was waiting at a stoplight on Elm Creek Blvd. I saw something that made me roll my eyes and laugh. There was a guy holding up a sign that on one side read "The wages of sin is death" and on the other side said "God's free gift is Eternal Life" or something close to that. You know, that verse in Romans... sorry, I've never been very good at scripture memory.
Anyways, if I wasn't a wuss and HAD automatic windows, I really wanted to yell out to him... "yeah, I know, so what's your point... and what do you think you're accomplishing by holding up your banner on a street corner."
This is no new or irregular news... christians do stupid things all the time in the name of Jesus, and it makes me sad. I guess I'm just noticing more how much it bothers me.
Contrast that with last night...
This awesome group of about 12 young people from South Africa came to praise and share with our youth group about their side of the world. Their worship was beautiful and energizing... reminiscent of Heart of the City... joy and soul coming out of their toes and all for Jesus Christ, not at all to put on a show. They shared with us an amazing story of their lives in Capetown, actually the slums of Capetown, I forget what they called it.. something " Estates" but it's nothing like estates at all. It's horrible poverty in the corner of an incredibly wealthy and beautiful city. I can't describe it all, but I was moved to tears as these young people stood up in front of us and talked of their horrific experiences. What made this so impactful to me, besides the stories and incredible worship, was the fact that this video they shared started out saying "we're not doing this to raise money, make you feel guilty, or any of that, it's to share what our life is and to celebrate love, God's love and power and miracles" -my paraphrase. It was a confirmation to my soul about where my spirit and passion for people lies.

Thank you Jesus, for this amazing ministry you have started in CapeTown South Africa, I pray for the pastor, that you would raise him up and give him strength and wisdom and continued support in whatever way he needs it. I thank you for the words you spoke to me, through them, last night.
Amen

adjusting

2006-07-16T15:29:00.000-05:00

It has been a little over two weeks now since I've been home from Belize. The days have gone by so quickly sometimes I think to myself, "did it really happen?" I had a few days to rest before getting back to work and once back to work it was "go go go." Work was so busy, and that was really good because I didn't have time to think about where I still really wanted to be.
On the flip side, I feel like I did a lot of reflecting those first few day and off and on last weekend, but this past week has been less reflective. I think it was because outside of work I was really busy too, having house-sat for the Adlers again. I don't like sleeping at their house because it is big and there are lots of noises so I had to juggle time and figure out how long to be with their pets at night. It was busy to say the least.

Now I sit, trying to decide what I want to say about this trip that made an impact on my life. I still don't quite know where to start. In the first blog I wrote about how there are similarities between Belize and Haiti. I don't know how to explain it, but I love Haiti in many ways and Belize in many ways. Some of them intersect... for instance the most important part of each place is the people who have made an imprint on my heart. I love the whole village of Tricote in Haiti because the whole village is a family and for the most part they are working together, but Hopkins Village, Belize there are select places that I love because the feeling that the whole village loves you is not the case. In Hopkins it is more technoligically advanced and people seem to fight for themselves, unless they are involved with Herdie's church. I don't know if I've explained this well, but to say it simply, Belize is another place that I've let into my heart to share with Haiti.
The Ariola's are the family with the Brittle Bone Disease kids, Raheem Cindy and Destiny.. they also have two other siblings, Sarah and Josiah(or Jo Jo). These children have a joy that comes from Christ alone. They are beautiful, all five of them, and have two wonderful parents who love them from their toes. Their mother is Vicky, she is only about 27, only 2 years older than myself. Last year we connected just a little bit at the end of the trip, and I wondered what it would be like this time around. She has been through so much it's sometimes hard for her to accept help and love from others, but clings and trusts God ruthlessly and I had the priveledge of hearing her story on the last day. We took a long walk on the beach and around the village, it was as if I was with a girlfriend from home just exchanging life stories. I wish we had been able to have more of those times because I feel like I made a new friend and now won't see her for a very long time. I thank God for the times I had with her and pray that their might be more in the future.
There were really fun times with the kids on the team as well... and as for my prayer about bringing us together as a team... that happened right away when we got there. If you read the Belize blog: www.teambelize.blogspot.com , you know that we had a slight problem with the bus that first travel day. We were stranded in the jungle on Hummingbird Highway half way to Hopkins Village. The whole team got off the bus and walked up the hill, huddled up and began to pray. Our hearts and minds were unified bringing our situation to Him and trusting that there was a reason for what was happening. It was an awesome adventure from the beginning and made this trip completely different not even able to compare with last trip, they were each great and unique.
The girls in my cabana were hilarious... I really got to know them better and vice versa. While being with people on a daily basis you get to see the many sides. I think it shocked one of them and it helped our dynamics a lot! She now can see me as a normal adult person who goofs around and has fun. It's hard to pick up on all the sides when you only get an hour and a half on a wednesday night. So, one of the nights we stayed up talking(well, 3 out of 4 of us) until 1am and laughed a lot, but also had conversations about life, love and other mysteries. (sorry, for those of you who know of the Point of Grace song... it just flowed. :)) It was a good bonding time! :) I love the senior girls!
We had a lot of rain-out days... one such day we all hung out in the guys' cabana doing various things... talking, making flyers for movie night, writing encouraging notes for each other(we had a wall with little bags with each of our names on 'em to put little notes in). Another rainy day some of the kids went to the "Innies" restaurant where we had our breakfast and dinners and played with their kids. The rainy days made it hard to do our crafts, which was frustrating to me because I planned all this stuff to do and there was no place to do it well in the rain. :( All I know though, is that crafts are not my thing, especially with kids that are hard to control. Each time we would get ready to do them, I'd think of ways to make it less chaotic and none of them worked. It would start out well, but then be crazy at the end!
Another cool thing about the trip is that the leadership was really great... we all had different strengths and I think we all complimented each other well. Especially Leah and myself, and we also got to know each other better which was super cool. I feel like I have another new friend!

So... I think that's about all for now... I still have boxes sitting in my room that are calling out to be unpacked. The sun and pool are also calling out, maybe they will get my attention first... we shall see. Oh, and another note... I bought a bike last week... so if anyone ever wants to go biking give me a ring!! I even have a bike rack(well, a friend is letting me use it since it won't work on his car) so I can take it places... it holds two! :)

Pics! (click on them to view larger)

2006-07-16T10:54:00.000-05:00

Because of all the rain, the entrance to our cabana's got flooded. But, not our actual cabana's, this is the main lobby/little restaurant place.

This is the late night in the jungle, would've turned out better if the pic wasn't blurry! :(

Here's the beautiful beach we got to look at each day! :)

The paintings i did from last year... I took another picture just cuz

back from belize

2006-07-01T16:44:00.000-05:00

love is all you need.

i'm slowly learning that belize is trying to share the place that Haiti has in my heart. but i do believe it is different in some ways. i will share more on that later.

it's good to sleep in my own bed... but home really isn't home, having moved while being gone. i knew it would be strange, but i didn't know how drastically it would affect my mood this morning. not having familiarity was really hard and brought me to tears many times, not to mention having some culture shock, too.

my cable line isn't going to be hooked up until thursday, so here i stand(because I need to go quickly) at Dunn Bros checkin' up on my e-life, if you will. :) course, not much was missed because everyone knew i was gone. it's all good... and funny to realize how much junk mail you can get in 11-12 days. Especially in the account that seperates the really really crappy stuff. you still get things like "new music tuesdays" from iTunes or Ticketmaster Concerts. Atleast I do, and never realized how much. There are some "random" facts for you.

and now i'm signing off... more processing and pictures to come...
call me or email, or i will(wasn't meant to sound like a threat)... i miss friends! :) hope to see you all soon

Refine Me...

2006-06-12T23:37:00.000-05:00

In one week I'll be in Belize, and I'm ready to be there RIGHT NOW. There are so many little things to remember and I have written things down, but I just want the day to be here so I don't have to think about them anymore. We will have a team blog while in Belize, it is www.teambelize.blogspot.com
Really original, eh? Yeah, I know... I would've made it a little more specific, but whatever I wasn't in charge. Not like it's a big deal... just blabbering... okay... now to the more serious or contemplative matter of the title.

I've been really introspective in the last month or so... off and on just really crying out to God from within about many different things. One thing I've been thinking about lately is about that "hole" that christians, including myself, talk about, that only God can fill. My latest wondering or thoughts about this are these:
1. I am human and sin, I will never be perfect in this fleshy skin.
2. If I am human, and can't be perfect... will I ever really feel like that "hole" that God is supposed to fill is always completely filled?

I mean, there are times when I feel that it is completely filled and I couldn't tell you for how long, but then there are many times when I feel really empty. I think that if I only had someone tangible to fill that spot, then, then I'd feel whole and complete with God. I know that's not true, even if I was married and had kids, it doesn't mean I'd have filled that hole. So... what do YOU think? let me know your thoughts..

on another note that is connected, I listened to Jennifer Knapp on the way up to Paynesville last friday... the good 'ol Kansas album. Refine Me really spoke to the place that I'm at right now... here it is...
(oh, and fyi: I don't feel completely empty right now, I re-read this and it sounds more depressing than the state that I'm really in)

I come into this place
Burning to receive your peace
I come with my own chains
From wars I've fought for my own selfish gain

You're my God and my Father
I've accepted your Son
But my soul feels so empty now
What have I become?

Lord, come with your fire,
Burn my desires; refine me
Lord, my will has deceived me
Please come and free me
Refine me

My heart can't see
When I only look at me
My soul can't hear
When I only think of my own fears
They are gone in a moment
You're forever the same
Why did I look away from You
How can I speak Your name?

Lord, come with Your fire,
burn my desires; refine me
Lord, my will has deceived me
Please come and free me
Come rescue this child
For I long to be reconciled to You

It's all I can do
To give my heart and soul to You
And pray, and pray, oh I will pray
Lord, come with Your fire, burn my desires; refine me

Lord, my will has deceived me
Please come and free me
Come rescue this child
For I long to be reconciled to You

Refine me, refine me
Refine me, refine me

Fishing... or lack, thereof...

2006-05-29T11:22:00.000-05:00

On Sunday I went up to Paynesville to go "fishing" with the fam. But, like I said in a previous post, it doesn't make sense for me to get a license because I just don't fish much. It was a perfect example of why I don't fish, either... I just don't have patience. It's wierd because I'm a pretty patient person, but when you're set on doing something, and that something doesn't always produce what you are there for, it doesn't make sense to me. (def. used too many commas there, haha) Needless to say we only caught two fish worth even catching and the other two were pretty much bait for real fish! My mom caught this Sunny and my dad caught the baby northern.

I had fun though because the weather was beautiful and I got to play with the niece and nephew. They did really well for being out on the boat for atleast 3-4hours! We hit some rough REALLY rough water which was great fun! I took some video on the cam., but it doesn't look as bad through the camera. It's the worst I've been on... but the most fun! :)
Josh didn't want his pic taken, but I snuck one quick, I like it! :)
Sarah is always smiles, usually they look like a forced "picture" smile, but these turned out pretty well.

I love this pic of us! The best part is, I totally didn't pose her. We were just sitting there and I looked over and saw her with her legs crossed and hands on them. Adorable. simply adorable, so we quick snapped a pic! :)

Now I'm off to the Brummond's for some BBQ'n and possibly more boat fun!

Painting Zone

2006-05-29T11:06:00.000-05:00

I wrote on Saturday that I was procrastinating packing, and then went to church. I had planned all along to paint at some point on Saturday and never got to that either.... until... after a power nap which I took after church... I needed some energy to embark on my painting escapade. (I'm flowering this up, way too much) Okay... this is what I did...

I had wanted to paint something for my sister and bro-in-law for christmas and never had the time, so I decided that I was going to finally start. We had talked about what she wanted, so earlier in the day I mapped out a few things on the computer. She told me she's going for a French "country" look, that's contemporary- not country like "mom" country (ie: cows, chickens, blues and pinks). In the picture you can see that her walls are a light greenish color, but what you don't see is that one of her walls is a maroon/brick red. The red and yellow are going to be her accent colors. I tied those in and she also asked for "fleur di li" so thanks to the wonderful world of symbol fonts, I was able to print them out and make stencils. (hey, not all artitsts make everything free-hand:)) You can also see on the wall to the left in the above pic that she has these great candle holders that are "vine" looking, so I added some vines to the pic as well. I'm quite pleased... and especially because it only took me about 3-4 hours to complete. I've never started and finished something at one attempt. I guess I was just in the zone and since I was going to see her the next day I thought it would be super awesome to have it done for her.

I added this one too, for no special reason other than maybe you can see the detail a little better. I couldn't take a non-blurry shot w/o the flash. Shoulda taken one during the day, outside or something. Owell... :)

Moving... stress... belize

2006-05-27T16:37:00.000-05:00

I hate the process of moving. I don't know anyone who likes it, unless they like it because you go through things and get rid of junk. Besides that, it just stinks. It doesn't help that I'm leaving for Belize BEFORE the move-in date and will be gone while my dad and bro-in-law move me. I feel awful, but the harder part is packing boxes. I feel that I need to start early because I'll have enough stuff to do trying to get things together for Belize, but I can't really pack up all the boxes until just before I leave, either.
So, that being said, I'm a bit stressed, but I'm in the calm before the storm phase. I'm actually sitting here typing because I'm procrastinating packing. I went and got boxes, and packing tape I just have to get them out of my car. But, really, it doesn't make any sense for me to start now, because I have to leave for church in ten minutes or less. (what was I doing for the last hour since I got home? putsing of course)...
Belize is coming in three short weeks... THREE... ahk... it just doesn't feel like it's coming together. I know it will and it is, but having completely different leadership than I'm used to (Steve/Al) is hard to adjust and feel out. It's strange to think that last year at this point, we were still in Haiti mode. We didn't find out until two weeks before, yet I somehow (though it was HARD to adjust) knew that everything was going to work out. Maybe it's just that Steve has a good way of putting you at ease and letting you know that he's got it under control. So, if anyone feels like praying... that's one thing that I need prayer for... trusting that Scott's really got this together and that we're not forgetting any important parts.

I'm off to church tonite... going up to my sister's in Paynesville to play on the lake... actually I should remember to bring a book because I think they're thinking of fishing mostly. I'm not a HUGE fan of fishing... especially since you have to get a license for like $17 and I won't be doing it very often anyways... owell... I'm sure we'll play in the water too. Anyways... you all have a wonderful Memorial weekend!

"go"

2006-05-18T00:10:00.000-05:00

Have you ever gotten a word that resonates, but you don't know exactly what it means?

Last week I was sitting in silence with God just asking questions about what I should do about some certain things. Whenever I do this I try really hard not to have a thought in my head, and if something pops in, I just dismiss it because I know it's just me. Well, that happened again, but this time for some reason it stuck with me and the word was "go." I don't think it means transplanting myself elsewhere... I don't know what it means, i'm still wondering if it was Him... so i'm waiting for Him and trying to quiet myself to listen again...

where you lead me lord, i will follow
where you lead me lord, i will go.
come and lead me lord, i will follow
come and lead me lord, i will go

i will go

A year already...

2006-05-11T21:26:00.000-05:00

Last weekend marks a year since last year's wedding bonanza... or "the weddings of '05" that I was asked to stand up in. It was last weekend and this coming weekend that were all a huge amount of fun and at the same time an emotional rollercoaster of sorts.
As I look back on where I was at last year, and where I am now, I see how much those weddings really affected the thoughts that ran through my head. I was constantly thinking about how I'd want my wedding to be and wondering who the person would be accompanying me. The last thought is yet to be determined and I'm learning and coming to know that it won't come in my timing. And that's probably better for all involved :). One thing I've really enjoyed is NOT thinking all about my own wedding and all the other stuff that goes along with them.

Instead, my thoughts have been on wondering what I want to do with my life other than getting married and eventually having a family. Things have been really interesting at work, although being extremely and wildly busy the two weeks before the 3Degrees Band Tourney(which was last week), Guy has been trying to define where his niche is and how to make Vision Van Gogh the most successful. One thing he has realized is that his knowledge of the music industry and how to get bands to maximize their income, is very valuable information. So, he recently recorded the talks he has given at seminars countless times, and will be selling those to generate income in a better way.
Another thing or idea that has been kicked around is the consideration of eliminating the overhead cost of office space. This is what got me thinking a lot about how that would look and what pros and cons it presented. My initial thought honestly was, "sweet, i could wake up at 9 and be to work by 9:30!" :) I know, pathetic... sleeping and waking up in the morning at a consistent time has not been my strong suit lately. Most of you probably would hate me if I told you my schedule, but when there isn't a "time to be at work" it's hard to keep yourself accountable. I did for the first 4yrs or so, and the last couple haven't been so normal... i always put in my time though... but I totally went off on a tangent. Okay...
So, yeah, working from home, an interesting concept that intrigues, yet scares me because keeping a routine is a hard thing for me. And, you'd still really have to keep things organized and professional even though it's at home... yeah, so there are many more pros and cons but I don't feel like sharing all of them since it's not like there has been any decision... mostly just an idea that is fun to think about and ponder for the time being.
This concept opens the door for the possibility of putting more energy into free-lancing. I started thinking about the idea back in dec./jan., but soon found myself feeling overwhelmed with knowing how I'd make time outside of work and then how to get myself out there and like I said... overwhelmed. I didn't think about it again until Guy mentioned this whole working at home and how we'd probably get paid per job instead, etc. I think he even said, "then you guys could do your own stuff too"... The other thing about trying to free lance now is that it would be hard to design at work and then come home and want to do the same thing, I'd get burned out I think.
The other area that I want to explore is painting. Ever since my aunt got me the hook-ups with a huge canvas and painting supplies that her friend of a friend's friend's ex-wife didn't want, I've been loving painting. Even though I don't make enough time for it, whenever I pick up a brush I just love being creative and messing around with different mediums and artistic direction. I've done a few things (besides the big piece of artwork on my living room wall).. a princess castle for my niece, a train for my nephew, a lily for Shannon, and a little set of square paintings for my grandma's bathroom. I've learned though, that it is hard to paint freely when you have a deadline to meet... so when I think of the possibility of maybe trying to start a decorative painting free-lance "company" or whatever you'd call it, I wonder if I would still find the same joy as when I get to just paint whatever I want and do whatever I feel like creating. I guess I just gotta pray about it and figure out what it is He wants me to do with that part of my life.

There you have it, a couple snippets of where my head has been lately. As usual, thanks for bearing with my lack of writing skills. I must depart... but I leave you with a snippet of my weekend:

My niece just turned five a week ago!! We celebrated her "Princess" party saturday afternoon and she looked adorable! My lovely sister sewed her a beautiful Cinderella dress, the blue one with white ruffeled sleeves and white poofy things at the waist! :) She LOVED it, and played the role great! She only cried once the whole day and quickly bouced back after a hug and explanation from mom! (not that she normally cries, but you know the tune, "it's my party and I'll cry if I want to, cry if I want to...etc)...

My little Autistic friend

2006-04-21T10:29:00.000-05:00

About a month ago I started working on a new cd project for a woman who is in the 3 Degrees Band Tournament. I've only heard her stuff a couple times, and it seems pretty cool. Maybe not my exact taste, but it's decent quality, so that's always a good thing.
The second time she came in to check on things she brought her little boy along. It didn't dawn on me at first, but Guy had told me about this lady before and about her son being autistic. They connected on that point because Guy also has a son who has autism, but is now much older.
This little guy is so fun, I guess he's more on the "savant" side of the autism or however you'd say that. When someone gives him a piano or any instrument he'll just start playing music and he's only about 7 or something.
The first time he came in I gave him this little car/bus that I keep sitting on my desk for times when kids come in. I didn't realize until the next week that he actually accidentally brought it home with him. He walked in the second time and said, "Here's your bus" or something like that.. and "Thanks."
So, yesterday they were in and he keeps saying really fast "Vision Van Gogh, Vision Van Stop" ... LOL... and then the best was "Vision Van Be Careful"... that made me crack up!
Today, they picked up a poster and he kept saying "This is what I'm saying, I'm NOT Going!" Apparently it's from ICE AGE, the first one. His mom was telling him to say something nice if he wanted to talk to me, and whispered something in his ear. He comes over to me and says "You're pretty" and then repeats the Ice Age line again. It was so funny, he's such a cute kid. When he was leaving I said "Good bye, have a good day" and he says "Good bye!! BYE LISA"

okay, I should be working, but I didn't want to forget to post this! It was quick! :)

Bird Flu Hits FL

2006-04-21T10:11:00.000-05:00

Tee hee... this was funny to me today! :)
Have a nice weekend everyone..

p.s. for those of you that may have bad eyes, they're PLASTIC flamingos.

(p.s.s. more Cali pics soon to come)

Cali... Easter... Life and Breath

2006-04-17T20:45:00.000-05:00

Wow... it's hard to know what all to write... this is random, so I guess I can write whatever... and so here we go... we'll go in order of events..

San Diego, California...
I went to this beautiful place with my roomie Ang, and stayed with her Gr. Aunt and Uncle, which were very "great" but not as in "old"... as in super fun and accomodating and just awesome!
It was so relaxing and wonderful and beautiful and fun... We took the aunt and uncle to Triple Espresso the first day, cuz my really cool friend who's got connections hooked us up with tickets for down there. Thanks man! (though you'll never read this anyways! ha!, but if you happen to, I demand a comment.. tee hee) The second day we went to the beach.. La Jolla (pronounced la hoya)... it was nice, but the temp. was cooler so we didn't even bring out suits. No worries tho, it was nice to be at the beach. This was the day my digi cam got dropped in the sand, DOH! As you can read in my previous posts I was mad, but now it is working again. So, I unfortunately didn't get to take any cool pics at this place down the coast from La Jolla, called Children's Pool. It actually is not for children anymore... it's a little cove and a clan of Seals took it over. It's really cool to see, but the seals are pretty ugly actually... that might sound mean, but they are kinda cute too, if that makes any sense.
Next day, we went to Sea World, saw a Sea Lion show, Dolphin Show, and of course SHAMU or for those of you living under a rug, the Killer Whale (orca) show. The coolest thing (besides Shamu) was this Dolphin interaction site. You could feed and pet the dolphins... it was soo cool. I loved it... i didn't buy fish because we just stood next to a kid who was feeding one and then got to pet it... it was like I said, the coolest thing! I would love to get in a wet suit and have even closer interaction. That was $40 though, and didn't really have the time/cash for that this time around. It would totally be worth it to me though.
The last full day we went back to the beach again, but a different one, Ocean Beach. It was actually (in my opinion) way better.. the openness and ocean feel was awesome. Not to mention that it was finally all bright and sunny... we had the suits on and finally got some good rays to bask in. I also found some cool shells and rocks.
All in all... good times... if we had longer, we might have gone to San Diego Zoo, but walking two days in a row didn't really thrill us, it takes way more out of you than you realize.

Easter and a breath of life felt...
I wanted to take some time to just follow up from the post I made about my sharing in the church service a couple weeks ago. In my post I was really struggling with feeling like I was still in the midst of dying and having a lot of heavy feelings around the whole sharing thing. I had a good day off after that and time to reflect some. After that, I slowly made a transition back into my normal routine and then took off for California. I hadn't thought a lot about it for awhile until someone mentioned it yesterday. Not to mention that Dave reviewed all that we had been going through as a church body in the text, etc. It was a great service, a time to be affirmed that in whatever place I am, it's okay and to remember that ultimately there is hope and LIFE. I am not sure exactly where I am at, but I do feel that life is here and that it has been... but sometimes it's a little blurry and hard to see.
And on that note, my sister just started a blog. (welcome to blogland, sis!) You see, we've both had our own experiences (well, duh), and I find her words so insightful. She's just another one of us who is trying to figure out Life and going through things that are hard, yet seeking with all her might, her God who has loved her from the first day. Why is that concept so hard to grasp and understand?
One more quick thing... on my trip I bought and almost finished reading the book "Blue Like Jazz"... many of my friends are or have read this book... In one of the last chapters it talks about the idea of when you are broght to the point of not understanding and you are at a place of wonder... that is where you can experience the awe and worship of God. I'm not giving this point justice, but if you haven't picked this book up, I'd encourage you to do so.

I think I've rambled on these random things long enough... you know, there not so much random as in that they came out of no-where, but maybe random in being put together in one post. :) okay... later my blogland friends!

2006-04-15T16:42:00.000-05:00

I have so much to catch up on, but here are a couple fun pics...

p.s. Yay for my camera... maybe it just needed to be jostled around in traveling and a little warm action in the car yesterday becauase it is working fine now. Woo hoo... (knock on wood)

Home

2006-04-14T00:35:00.000-05:00

Well, I'm back, safe and sound... and still on Cali time. It's only 10:48 out there. I'd be just getting ready for bed. Which I just did now here, and should be sleeping because I am going to work tomorrow morning. Silly, I know, but I only have so many vaca. days, and still planning to go to Belize with the youth again this june.
Anyways...
I'm not sure why I'm posting this, other than to procrastinate going to bed and to just let ya'll know I'm back. The unfortunate thing is that it may take a while for me to get pics on here. It was SOOO sad... so the second day, we went to the beach and before we left I had a nice young man take our picture. When I gave him the camera, he DROPPED IT! He was so appologetic, and it was an accident, but DANG! It worked for about 3 or 4 more pictures, but then when I turned it on about twenty minutes later the screen said "Lens Error"... CRAP, that can't be good. I tried to turn it off and the lens shutter wouldn't even close. I was so annoyed the rest of the day. (BIG SIGH) I bought a dumb disposable one for the rest of the time, but it just ain't the same. It was so sweet though, as you'll soon learn more, we stayed with Angela's relatives and her Great Uncle let me use his digital camera one of the days. But, it'll be a little while until he can send them to me. He's retired, but helps out at a church with folk's who need help with their taxes. Needless to say, it's a bit of a busy time. SO.... hopefully I'll be posting back sooner than later, with good news from National Camera Exchange!!! (oh please, God!!!)

Long awaited, much anticipated... vacation

2006-04-08T01:29:00.000-05:00

Well, like I said in my story that I shared last week... God always has perfect timing. Little did I know when I planned a trip to San Diego, it would be even more than just a vacation from work. Of course, I'm not running away from my situation, but a vacation from stress never hurt anyone!
It's really nice too, cuz it has been pretty easy going a pace at work, not anything huge I'm leaving for Georgia. She'll thank me later... except I also timed it just right because our favorite client is going to be at the office next week. I think he might not be there as much, I think he's trusting us a bit more lately. If you don't know who that is, or anything about him, well, you've missed out. I deleted the old blogs about him too, just for precautionary reasons. Although, I did save them to my hard drive. :) Anyways...

SAN DIEGO, or bust, baby! I'm ready.... set...
GO!!

(p.s. the title of my blog is the beginning of a line in a John Reuben song... can anyone finish it?? okay, I know... who listens to him anymore? I don't, but i would smile if anyone can humor me. :) )
p.s.s. you can expect to see some pictures of San Diego as well... can't wait to really take advantage of my new or not so new anymore... digital cam!

i just added this for fun. i took it while driving in my car... i know... hazard, but nobody was around... it's in the back roads of champlin/dayton/maple grove

Dying to Live... felt like dying

2006-04-02T19:32:00.000-05:00

Breathe peace, Breath your peace on us...
So we might breath you deep...

For those of you who don't know, I shared a part of my story in the service this weekend. If you missed it you can go to Open Door's website and click on This Week's sermon. You can watch it on Quicktime or Window's Media Player, however it may not show up until Mon. or Tues....
Here is the text version of it... if you don't want to wait... (there were four others who shared as well, so I'd encourage you to watch it, they had great things to share as well).

I love how God works in my life, it's never the same. And it's always in His perfect timing, even when I try and mess it up.

Recently, he has been showing me the places in my life that need cleansing. I didn't know exactly how to start, so I met with the Restoration Through Prayer people here at church. Through that time of prayer and discussion I was able to uncover some feelings of bitterness that I always felt awful about.

The root of those feelings formed in my adolescent years, years when my parents struggled with my sister's rebellion. In those times of battle, I was left alone praying for God to send someone to rescue me or just make the fighting stop. I never recognized the bitterness, because I felt guilty for having those feelings, when my parents and especially my mom didn't mean to neglect my needs. I can't imagine what it would be like to be a parent in that situation.

The Restoration Through Prayer took place just a couple days before the "Dying to Live" sermon. Even though I was able to see and acknowledge the bitterness during that prayer time, I didn't fully know how to let it go, or still didn't know if I wanted to let it go.

During the time of the first sermon I didn't feel I should rush up to bury my seed. I needed time to think about what it was I was actually doing. I wrestled with life that whole week. I knew I needed to share this with my parents, but the winds of resistance blew strong and I didn't put much effort in.

As a result, Sunday morning came and I hadn't met with them, I wondered if I should still go up. As I searched my heart, I realized that it was still something I needed to do, but that in doing so, I still needed to speak to my parents.

So I went up, spent some time at the cross and buried my seed. It wasn't anything magical and I didn't feel an immediate change, but it was the first hard step of death, into becoming more alive.

The next step meant talking to my parents, and this time I planned it right away. Even though I knew they would listen, it was still hard.

But, once I shared those feelings I felt lighter and I knew healing was taking place. It meant for me, that I had fully died to that bitterness and brought light into the dark places of my heart.

Like I said before, this is just the beginning, I know there are more things in my life that need to die, and I am excited for the new life that I believe will grow in me.Being a part of the service this weekend was exhausting, it was very different than I expected. Though I didn't really know what to expect... I didn't realize just how emotinally draining it would be. Part of me, if I'm real honest, feels like the weekend was wasted, though I shouldn't say it like that because it was an incredible time and I know God moved. But, I mean, I didn't get a whole lot done, it's that "I need a vacation from my vacation," feeling, but with the weekend. I guess I need to learn that sometimes it is okay to not get things done. I never pictured myself as a work-a-holic or a task oriented person. Maybe it's just the fact that I didn't get to choose how I spent my time, feels kind of selfish, there were things I wanted to do though. But, I couldn't have done anything different... hmmm... I'm rambling and going off on a tangent... so what else do I want to say?
It was hard.
I honestly thought the hardest part would be the actual speaking, which don't get me wrong it definitely was with fear and trembling that I shared, but the time after second service of knowing it was done was the hardest.
I was just talking to my sister today and I think that it's just that "let-down" feeling. I never knew I'd feel that way... it's not like I was performing and hoping for a good response, honestly it really didn't matter to me. Of course, I did want my friends to support me (which they did), but I wasn't really concerned with how the congregation received it. Al just kept reminding us over and over that it's not about us, it's about God and giving the glory to Him.
(ugh.. side note: I hate my loud and obnoxious neighbors and their LOUD bass... it's giving me a headache... and did last night, too! until i called the cops at 1:30AM-2:30 with time change)
Why is it that it's so hard for me (today) to feel like rejoicing for what He has done in my life, I guess it just still feels like dying. This process is still going on, and I really really just want the life to come.. <> I'm just not feeling it right now...

Dear Jesus,
I know that what you've done in me, this weekend and over the last year has been life changing... and right now I feel the enemy attacking, would you BIND his evil thwarts against me, God!

Blogger Anniversary!

2006-03-20T23:31:00.000-06:00

Well, after reading David's blog and reading that it has been a year for him, I realized that I too have marked a year on this blogging journey! Yay, so happy anniversary to me... I'd like to thank a couple of people who inspired me... one is to Glatzel., because I do believe he was the one from whom I received the first notice about this whole "blogworld"... and second to Erin, for cute/funny/absurd(at times) stories that showed me that it doesn't really matter what your blog is about, it's about Just Writing whatever is on your mind.
Looking back it has been an interesting year of posts... a road trip to Chicago... going through the highs and lows of multiple friends getting married, and being in three of them... trying to figure out the whole dating scene and what means what... house-sitting adventures... travels to Belize which were supposed to be Haiti... Gooseberry Falls... My 25th Birthday... and other very random posts true to it's name.
We shall see what this year brings... atleast one thing for sure... I do need a new background for a new year! :)

Have a good night!

Kirby will be missed :(

2006-03-09T23:38:00.000-06:00

Wow... I was so surprised at this early death of a childhood baseball hero. I knew he wasn't looking as good, etc, but it's this "immortal hero" mentality I guess. I have so many fond childhood memories of going to a Twins game, sitting in the Cheap Seats and eating Cotton Candy. I bet I went to atleast 3-4 games a year or so as a kid... I bet that's how I learned the Star Spangled banner so well, not to mention "take me out to the ballgame"...
I've never watched a Twins game with the same love since he left, and I probably never will. There was just something about his love of the game and passion on the field, he drew you in and you couldn't not like the guy.
I still have my homer hanky and Kirby Puckett (fake-signed) mini-bat. I loved that thing!

That classic Kirby announcement will live with me forever...

KIIIIRRRRRRRRRBBBEEEEEEEy PU-CKET! (and the crowd goes wild... aaaarrrhhhh aaaawwhhh)

We're gonna Win Twins, We're gonna Score!
We're gonna Win Twins, now watch that baseball sore...
Pound out(?) a HomeRUN shout a HIP HORAY
Cheer for the Minnesota Twins TODAY!

Addiction, Obsession, or just interested in people?

2006-03-05T23:49:00.000-06:00

Since the world of computers was opened to me, I was always interested in them. Especially way back when the world wide web was introduced, and AOL... I admit, as a 9th/10th grader I was a HUGE fan of going into "christian" teen chat rooms and meeting people from all over the nation and having random conversations about whether DCTalk's JEsUs FreAk or Newsboy's SHINE was the best "all-time" song thus far... or yelling at some "satan worshipper" who came into the room just to ryle everyone up(and boy did we feed that!)... I sit back and laugh at those times... Well, it took a downward plummet for awhile as more important things (like real friends;)) entered my life, getting a driver's license, and more homework. Although I definitely still kept up with emailing some of these "online friends" I met, and of course other friends as well.

This really does have a point... let me try and get to it before I go off in another direction...
as of late I've realized that I really get hooked to things like this.. blogs, xanga(a more kid type blogger journal thing, I use with my highschoolers), and now myspace. It could be anything... but it's this sort of addiction to see if someone has "commented" me.. or just changing the looks of things all the time... or jumping from person to person to read and see what people are thinking about life and what not. I think it can be a really good thing, but I've noticed that no matter what it is... blogs or myspace or whatever... I get really engrossed and before I know it an hour or so has passed.

So, my question to myself is...
Is the time that I'm spending in front of this screen always the best... even if it is in the name of wanting to hear about other's lives. I think I've begun to answer my question in part... the answer so far is this... there is obviously nothing wrong with wanting to be updated with the lives of others, and wanting to use this technology as a good teaching or relating tool, but if that time is taking over other parts of my life... than I need to stop and change some things.

That is why I haven't been posting as often lately... not to mention the "obsession" of myspace unfortunately took over for awhile. I resisted it for a long time, mostly because it was such a "trendy" thing.. and then I decided to peruze it for a little bit just to see what some of the "so-called" controversy was... and then I was able to get a grasp of it... but then slowly it took over me a little and I realize how people can get "addicted" to it...

So. there you have it. I'm working on getting this all balanced... it's almost as if I've got too many "web" things going. I've decided to spend only a half hour on the internet (at home atleast) per day for Lent... and spend time doing other things that matter... you know like that God thing :) tee hee... jk... but for real. I've definitely waaay exceeded it for today, but I can give myself grace.

Kinda feel silly sharing all this, but that's that.
the end...

(don't worry, i've not gone pyscho and think that this is all evil! :) )

The Second Chance

2006-02-26T20:45:00.000-06:00

Okay, now that I've got some time, I can try and give a short review of my opinion of The Second Chance. After getting past the distraction of MWS acting(which wasn't completely awful, just odd seeing him on the screen), I then had to try and stomach the fact that the "whitey" church they portrayed is sadly more common than I want to believe. So, I think it did a good job of representing how evangelical christians tend to throw money at a problem in the inner cities, making themselves "feel-good" because they've just helped the needy. I don't claim to know what the best way is to help in that area... but I know that it's more than just throwing money something. And, I don't know if this movie did any good to say how to do it either. Not sure where I'm going with this anymore. My general feeling was that I'm glad I saw it... it was surprisingly better than I thought... seriously... for a christian movie. It wasn't AS cheesy as ones put out by Billy Graham, etc. (no offense to the man)... and I'd probably watch this one over any of the Left Behind ones (only seen one, and not by my choice... it was enough). It could have had better character developement and a way better ending... but like I said... for me, it was worth seeing.

Hopefully this review wasn't too painful to read through my jumbled thoughts and ramblings...

Update on Raheem

2006-02-25T08:36:00.000-06:00

Good news. Raheem is at home and feeling better.

In other news, I went to see "The Second Chance" last night. I'll give it a review soon, just no time right now. I am going to my sister's because they bought a house! Yay.. such a good thing for them, but it's still an hour away... the city is called Paynesville... what a sad name. It's just 10-15mins west of St. Cloud, so atleast they will be close to a major city. Not TOO hick-landish. Well, I must leave, but if you have seen that movie and have any opinions... feel free to leave them here... good, bad... ugly... whatever. :)

lata

Raheem

2006-02-21T19:34:00.000-06:00

My dear Raheem who I met this summer in Belize is not doing so well. He has double pnuemonia and the last I heard they didn't know how long he may hold on. So, if you think of it, send a prayer up for him. My prayer:

Lord God,
You are the divine healer, and I pray your healing hand would touch Raheem, let him not suffer any longer. Whatever that means Lord, your will be done...

Amen

2006-02-14T23:59:00.000-06:00

I've been a Valentine's grinch most of the day... but I thought I'd show a little spirit and have fun with it... so here's my greeting to you all in blogland! Hope you had a lovely day(now that it 's actually over... i'm up late as usual)

SUPERbowl!

2006-02-05T23:30:00.000-06:00

Hello again out there in blogland! It has been awhile since I've gone for over two weeks without a post. I just haven't had an urge to post or known what to post about. Well, tonight I had a great idea because of the Superbowl... everyone who watched the Superbowl has SOMEthing to say about it... even myself who doesn't usually sit down to watch a game, unless there is some sort of gathering. FOr me, the draw was mostly for the commercials... I guess I'm a bit of the typical female or stereotypical female when it comes to that. I have to say though, this year I actually got into the game... the party I was at had most people rooting for the SeaHawks, so I naturally took the side of the Steelers, for some good competition. The thing is, I actually really can get into it when there are great plays to be seen, and for me, I'd say this game had some pretty great moments! So... Congrats STEELERS! :)

The best two commercials this year for me were...
Budweiser commercial with the streaking sheep/lamb! That was fricken hilarious!!
and
MAC GYVER mastercard comercial!! (sp?) That was Awesome... wouldn't have ever thought of that. (the whole time I was thinking/hoping that Erin should be watching this!! )

Brown and Bubbly Pepsi commercial get's the "so stupid, it unfortunately made me chuckle at the end" award, but that's just my opinion.

So, there you have it... did anyone else have a favorite commercial or moment in the game?

A TRIBUTE TO SCOTT! and "The Office" Obsession

2006-01-20T00:26:00.000-06:00

Our dear friend and co-worker Scott announced to us last friday that he is moving on from VVG. The reasons definitely make sense, and he will be greatly missed, and never forgotten for the many qualities and successes he brought to our team. One of those things was being influential in the decision to use a new printer for our large run CD booklet/traycard printing. Just one of the small things he added to the company... so to honor him on his last day(tomorrow, friday), "the design team" (and Angela, our production superstar) we wanted to give him a fun surprise... so, VOILA... (post-its and tinfoil are so handy! I think we may need to order some more)

Before/After

(I was in a wierd mood all day! it's not all that abnormal tho)

(although it's not a 100% new idea, we took this on to a superb, if I do say so myself, level of creativity!)

Balanced!

2006-01-17T23:52:00.000-06:00

One thing I hate most in life is balancing my checkbook... I finally got a new checking account and things seemed to be going fairly well, until I made a couple stupid mistakes and made myself get overdrawn because I transfered money to a diff. account before I should have.(forgive my run-on sentence) It was so frustrating because I had the money... it just wasn't in the right account! GRR! I really don't know what I was thinking. So, for the last week I relied on my credit card until things just leveled out again. Thank Goodness for Online Banking!
I had to set everything straight in my checkbook tonite and wanted to make sure it all balanced out. I was nervous as I wrote everything in and started calculating... the first time through, it came up unbalanced, but I remembered a couple things and re-calculated and VOILA! Perfect Match! How Beautiful life is when those things check off right, makes me want to do a little dance that I did it right, without having to call my dad and ask... "Okay, so do I add the deposits or subtract them... I always forget?" I Remembered myself... (pat on the back)... this seems like a silly thing to post, but I haven't had a statement balance out like that for atleast a year. That makes me smile! :)

Oh, and this past weekend was the Sr. High Winter retreat at Timber Bay Bible Camp... it was a great weekend! Here's a couple pictures... sunsets, broomball, and a somewhat creative pic for ya.

(as you can see, to the right of this picture, someone wiped out... it was WAY slippery!)
(careful getting up, Gary!)It is so beautiful and peaceful up-north!

grrr

2006-01-12T22:20:00.000-06:00

Haiti is cancelled...

Lord, I don't understand sometimes... but well, life has never always been easy to understand... so why should it change now!

excerpt from "Foreverandever etc." by David Crowder

I think I'm on the brink of something large
Maybe like the breaking of a dawn
Or maybe like a match being lit
Or the sinking of a ship
Letting go gives a better grip

I'm finding everything I'll ever need
By giving up gaining everything
Falling for You for eternity
Right here at Your feet
Where I wanna be
I am Yours

definitely random... news... blogger books... snowmen..

2006-01-02T23:14:00.000-06:00

• New anchor on Kare 11... Who is this Mike guy anyways?
I've been a pretty loyal fan to Kare11 for most of my news-watching life, which I'd say is about 10-15years or so. I don't consistently watch the news, but when I can, I do and it's just not the same if it's not Kare11. So, when all this change started with Ken Barlow and Frank Vascellero leaving, I have to admit I was a little disapointed. So, I'm skeptical of this new Mike Pomeranz, but he seems to be pretty MN saavy, etc... check out his bio on www.kare11.com, and see for yourself :).

• Blogging Book at Borders...
I was strolling through Borders tonight, looking at some Graphic Design and Web Design books, and as I skimmed the shelves my eye caught a book with the title put simply "Blogging." It made me laugh because I wondered who needed a book about Blogging, it's pretty easy to set up with the step by step instructions. Despite my initial mocking, I picked it up and began to skim the pages. I surprised myself in thinking, hmm, should I get this?... this thought came to me because I still have yet to figure out how to get a fricken picture on my profile page. It's easy to get them into the body of a post, but they make you go through a bunch of rig-a-ma-roll for the profile pic. Why do I need a photo hosting site, JUST for a picture on my profile? Picasa/Hello or whatever that thing is doesn't work for Macs... (stupid) and I can't seem to get it to connect to my .mac homepage which holds a few pictures. WHATEVER... I didn't buy it though, because I knew I wouldn't use all the info in it for what it was worth. It was interesting to realize that Blogging has been around long enough for a book to be published about it. It seems I'm a wee babe in this blogging world... always learning :).

• Snowmen
I just thought I'd share my snowman story. It's not that exciting, but just thought I'd leave you with a laugh...
I took the day off friday, and as all of the Minnesotans know, we got a beautiful new layer of fluffy white and wet snow to add to our already pretty large portion. Every other time it has snowed this year, when it was really good sticky snow, I've been at work or been really busy. Whenever I'm at work I say (sometimes aloud even) I just want to go home and make a snowman. I went about my day doing mostly mundane things, until I was driving back from Target and remembered my thought of the previous snowfalls... I just want to make a snowman. I questioned myself, it I really would find it fun... especially doing this all alone, but I went inside (waited for the snowplow guys to leave) put my snow gear on and, yes, made a snowman. This turned out to be a lovely snowman, though I had to be creative with the detailing... black olives for eyes, a carrot nose and celery for arms. The olives were not so fun to make stick for the eyes, so I couldn't imagine trying to make a mouth out of them. Instead, being the painter I am, I got out my tempera paints and put a red smile on him. Of course he also has a hat on his head, a scarf, and mittens on the ends of his extremities. (though one slid off because the celery drooped already) :(

With that, I'm signing off... the moral of the last story is... "You're never too old to be a kid!"

Updates...

2005-12-30T17:07:00.000-06:00

Hello folks! Now that the letters are out, I thought I'd break the news onto this blog as well! I'm going back to Haiti... YIpeEE! So, if you want more info, etc... or a letter in that case, email me/post a comment or hop on over to www.haitijournal.blogspot.com

I will be trying to keep that blog updated with thoughts and prayers about this new journey(yet, not so new in my heart :))

In other news...
I bought a digital camera (gulp, an overwhelming process)... I like it... I think... it's such a big purchase, but it's one of those small Nikon Coolpix cameras... it feels too small to really take decent pictures. But as in other areas of life I should remind myself... size doesn't always matter! :) It's got 5.1 megapixels and 3x zoom, and a Lithium/Ion battery... I was going to get this other one that seemed a bit more sturdy, but you had to buy a battery charger and AA rechargable batteries too... an extra 30bucks... that one had 5x zoom, but I just don't think I use zoom enough anyways. And, this one I got seems to do pretty well... although when I try to shoot with the Macro mode with no flash, it wigs out and a "steady camera" icon blinks. I even set it on the table and shot the object and it still wouldn't go away. Annoying! So, I'll have to figure that one out, and I got free passes to the classes that National Camera gives, so that'll be good. Here are a couple fun shots I took while playing with it last night.

I think this one was actually without the macro setting on, and auto flash... not bad I guess. I wish I could have gotten outside to take some wintry snow shots, but the day just got away from me. Bummer! Owell... that's all for now.

Have a Happy New Year ya'll!