Mountain Highs and Valley Lows

March certainly came in like a lion, and has gone out like a lamb.
Both literally and figuratively.

With the big snow in the beginning of March, came big news of my acceptance into the DTS program with YWAM in Brisbane Australia. Such excitement and mixed emotions, as I wrote about previously here.
About a week later came the news of my dear little girl-friend Cindy Ariola. She passed away one night after battling flu like symptoms on and off for a couple weeks. This was hard news to hear, but we all came together and prayed for her brothers, sisters, mother and father. It was a night of celebration that Cindy would now be walking, running, and singing in heaven.

The following Wed. night was another sorrow filled night... the leaders all sat in our usual meeting and dinner before the evening and received the news that our Senior High youth pastor was asked to resign.. or at that point had just read a letter stating he was leaving. We all sat in disbelief, not having any questions answered, just that he was gone and that we had to keep our faces straight until the night started and the youth were told. It was the hardest night I've ever faced as a youth leader. They gave us nothing, and at the beginning I blindly trusted that the leadership of the church new what they were doing and as the questions came in small group, I held to that belief. Later that night and the next day, the truth in my heart was revealed, and my blogs followed in my confusion and frustration.

The weekend that followed was filled with plans and trying to get ready to go to Colorado for a Ransomed Heart Ministries, "Captivating" women's retreat. It was the PERFECT time to get away and find rest in the arms of my abba father. Although it was hard being away for the next wed. night, not being there for the kids, my own heart needed healing. Before the retreat I met with an old friend in Denver and had some beautiful time re-connecting with her and rest at her house.
There is so much to say about the retreat I don't really know where to start. I met some beautiful hearts... many that were my age and some that were older and wiser. I had time to wrestle with God and be really frustrated and mad, but also time as I mentioned earlier to just sit in the arms of my father. Let him embrace me as I cried out and yelled and carried on... I wanted so much for him to tell me the exact things I needed to do when I arrived home. To start a petition, walk out, change churches, boycott.... but none of those were things He said to me. The words I came away with were Ruthless Trust (which I actually hear is a good book), trusting in him even when I don't understand how I can.... knowing that He is the only one I need to trust... I don't have to trust the leadership of the church, because no matter how hard they try, they will never do things perfectly. It sucks and I hate that.... but we're human and messy... and God's not.
It was a wonderful time to take in God's beauty of the Mountians and make some really great new friends.

I got home last monday with the news that my sister had almost gone into labor the friday I was in Denver. I was most pleased when I heard it didn't happen because I was supposed to be in the room with her this time around. The week at work brought much to do, but it was nicely manageable(sp?).
On thursday my sister was having numbness in her legs and her doctor wasn't being very proactive... long story short, they switched to a doctor in St. Cloud and he was very proactive and scheduled to induce on Thursday. To prepare for this they use gel to "soften" the cervix, to see if that would help her to go into labor on her own. She started on her own, but it suddenly stopped, so late on Thursday night/Friday wee early morning they started the ptosin (i'm sure that's spelled wrong!!). I drove up to St. Cloud on fri. morning and got there around 8:30am.. and she decided she wanted an epideral... it was a long hard night and she needed some relief.
I'll add more details in another post, but she had my beautiful niece Julia Ann at 12:09 pm... what an amazing miracle of life! It was the coolest thing to experience, I wouldn't trade it for the world.


a beautiful symbol of March going out like a lamb, my sweet little Julia Ann..........

pictures to come